Meet Bob

BOB and BARBARA enter the stage with an apple and other junk
BOB holds up the apple

Bob: Apples Dun Dun Dun

Barbara: What's so scary about apples?

Bob: Hello?? Vampires hold them and make people faint at the sight of the apple in their hands..... SO MUCH POWER

Barbara: Uhh I think that they faint at the good lookingness of the vampire not the apple.....

Bob: Well either way the vamp is powerful

Barbara's face looks blankly at Bob because of his stupidity
Bob ignores her and moves on

Bob: Barb, I'm gonna be the first on the moon

Barbara: Armstrong has already done that

Bob: Lance Armstrong? Did he bike all over the moon too? Why does the dude have to take everything dream I have? First biking now the moon!?!?!?!

Barbara: Ok I was talking about Neil Armstrong so calm down... will all be ok

She hands Bob a paper bag

and he hyperventilates into it
As he takes a deep breath he says,

Bob: Are they related?

Barbara: Does it matter?

Bob: Heck ya it matters! I need to know this useless trivia to survive in the real world!

(Bob's face turns cherry red)

Barbara: I don't know look it up on Google please just take deep breaths

Bob: I would if I knew how to work with that technology

Barbara: Wow.........

Bob: Well if someone has already gone on the moon then I guess will be the first on the sun

Barbara: You can't go on the sun you'll burn!

Bob: Ok Barb why must you underestimate the BOB GROOVE? I am not stupid you know.... I am going at night

Barbara: Alright I am just gonna walk away before my brain frys into a brainburger

Barbara exits

Bob: OOOO save me a piece please !

End scene