Alex and James

Beep beep beep. Beep beep beep. BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.

Alex moans and slaps the snooze button on his obnoxious alarm clock. 6:30, it reads in bright neon green.

Ugh. First day of school, he thinks as he rolls off the bed and walks unsteadily towards the bathroom. Joy.

After washing his face, brushing his teeth, and putting some eyeliner on, he throws on some clothes and goes downstairs. Looking out the window, he sees that it’s already light out-summer isn’t completely gone yet. Pity he has to spend it in a place that’s sure to be h*ll on earth. He drinks a cup of black coffee, then grabs his old backpack and heads to the bus stop. The street corner is already crowded with at least twenty people in various states of wakefulness. Most are either listening to their iPods or texting on their phones. Alex pulls out a book and starts reading.

The bus comes about five minutes later. He gets on with the rest of the students, then immediately heads towards the back. Unfortunately, the last row seats are all taken, so he has to sit closer to towards the middle. Thirty seconds later, he realizes that he has made a vey bad decision when the first spitball hits him on the head. And so it begins, he thinks. I thought that maybe high school students would be beyond this type of behavior, but apparently not.

By the time the bus reaches the school, Alex counts four more germ-infested wads of paper, two significantly harder unidentified objects, and one derisive whisper of “c**ksucker”. Apparently on this bus the jerks all sit in the back, he observes as he gets off the bus, surprisingly without getting tripped or otherwise humiliated. Must make a note of that for future reference.

The first two periods of his first day in high school pass without significant incident. Alex fights to stay awake as he shuffles to his third period, Precalculus. When he reaches the classroom and walks in, he spots a familiar face in the corner. He smiles and waves. The face glances towards him, then looks away again as if it didn’t register him at all. Alex’s smile fades. What the h*ll, he thinks. Did he not recognize me or something? Is it because I dyed my hair black? He starts walking forwards, only to be jerked back by the teacher, who informs him that this class has a seating chart. He gets placed on the opposite side of the room. Class starts, and Alex has no time for more than a few surreptitious glances before Mrs. Fields launches into a full-blown lecture. And since he’s a good student, he concentrates on taking notes.

Suddenly, he feels a tap on his shoulder. “For you.” A girl whispers when he turns around, holding out a piece of folded up paper. She giggles as he takes it. Alex looks at it suspiciously and opens it.

FAG

He rolls his eyes and rips it in half. Laughter again, this time from the other side of the room. He turns towards it, and his heart sinks. It’s that guy, laughing at him with his burly jock buddies, pointing and sneering. Alex turns back to the front of the room and glares at the blackboard angrily.

“Something wrong, Mr…” Mrs. Fields hasn’t memorized all the names yet.

“No.” He says sullenly. “Nothing.”

The whispers continue throughout the class. Funny how she doesn’t notice that, he thinks glumly. Where is the justice?

Everything goes downhill from there. In Home Ec., he accidentally uses salt instead of sugar and ruins the cupcakes, making everyone in his group hate him. In P.E, he lags behind so far during the mile run that the teacher ends up screaming at him. By the end of the day, he feels like either bursting into tears or going into a homicidal rage.

When Alex gets home, he collapses onto his bed and sleeps for three hours. He’s awakened by the sound of the doorbell ringing. “Better not be those evangelist people again.” He grumbles, plodding down the stairs and opening the door.

He stares at the person on the other side of it. It’s him. “What do you want?” he snarls. “Come to make fun of me some more, James?”

James looks uncomfortable and embarrassed. “No, of course not. I wanted to apologize for today. I just kind of… had to go along with it, because they were doing it and I-“

Alec slams the door in his face. “What the f*** does that mean?” he yells.
“ ‘Had to go along with it’? You could’ve told them to stop!”

James’ voice comes from the other side of the door. “I’m sorry, okay? But you know, with the nail polish and eyeliner and stuff, you could tone it down a little. Maybe if you weren’t so… flamboyant… they would leave you alone. They’re actually okay people.”

Alex sighs. “I tried that in middle school, remember? It’s not just the nail polish and eyeliner, It’s my face and the way I walk and everything that makes me me. I’d rather be myself and be bullied than try to act normal and still be bullied. This is who I am, James! You said that you loved me for that! Did one summer at football camp change you that much?!” He’s nearly shouting by the end of it.

James doesn’t answer.

“You know what?” Alex says, dejected. “Just leave. Go on making fun of me with your jock friends. We’re over.”

He walks back upstairs, ignoring the pounding on the door and James’ cries of “Alex!” Alex buries himself under his bedcovers and holds his hands over his ears. A few minutes later, the knocking stops. He curls up into a ball and drags his hand across his eyes. A**hole, he thinks viciously as tears start streaming down his face. D*mn you.

The rest of the week passes by much the same. No more notes, but plenty of staring and whispers of “fag” and “queer” and “c**ksucker”. At school, Alex ignores James and James ignores Alex. James still comes by Alex’s house very evening, but Alex ignores him then, too. You think you can just come to me whenever people aren’t watching? No f***ing way. Alex spends the weekend tackling his incredible mountain of homework and tries not to think of James.

Monday afternoon, he gets beaten up on his way home from school and ends up in the hospital.


James is in agony. It feels like there’s a gaping hole in his chest. He doesn’t know what to do- if he defends Alex and hangs out with him at school, his other friends won’t accept it, and if he keeps ignoring Alex at school, Alex will keep on hating him. He sighs and lets his head fall to his desk. It’s not like they’re really bad people, he thinks. They’re just a little narrow-minded when it comes to gays.



Monday evening, James walks over to Alex’s house for the umpteenth time. He’s surprised to see the family’s blue Honda in the driveway- Alex’s mother usually works very late. As he’s walking up the porch steps, Alex’s mother walks out, holding a pile of clothes. Her eyes are red and her face is withdrawn. “Oh,” she says when she sees James. “Are you here to see Alex?”


James nods. “Yeah. Um… are you all right, ma’am?” he asks cautiously.


Alex’s mother laughs weakly. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Shocked and worried, but fine.” She looks at him sadly. “Alex is in the hospital.”


James feels his stomach drop. “What? Why?”


She shakes her head. “ He won’t tell us what happened, but it looks like someone- or a group of people, more likely- attacked him on his way home from school. It was just a few hours ago.” She looks like she’s on the verge of tears again. “He had to be rushed to the emergency room.” She nearly sobs.


“Oh, my God.” James whispers. “How bad is it?”


“His life isn’t in danger.” Alex’s mother sniffs. “ But he’s bruised and cut all over, and his ribs are cracked.”

“God.” James is unable to say anything else.

“Do you want to come to the hospital with me?” she asks. “I just came back to get some things for Alex.”

“Yes.” He says. “I want to see him.”



James stands in the doorway, frozen in shock. He already knew about Alex’s injuries, but seeing them firsthand was an entirely different experience. Alex looks like a complete mess, with bandages all over his body and a huge purple bruise on his face. He turns his head and looks at James.


“Oh, it’s you. Come to beat me up some more? You missed out on all the fun when your friends came to get me.” He mutters angrily.


“What? What do you mean?” James is getting that sinking feeling in his stomach again.


“You’re friends,” Alex spits “the ones you care about so much. They were the ones who did this. He glares at James. “Still think they’re good people?”


“No.” James breathes. “They did this? They wouldn’t.”


Alex turns away with a disgusted look on his face. “Believe what you want to believe. I don’t care anymore. Get out.”



James stands in silence for a few more moments, then gets up and leaves.



The next day at school, he asks his friends, “Did you guys really do it?”


Max looks at him. “Do what?”


“Beat up Alex.”


Max grins. “Oh, you mean that gay dude? Yeah, we got him all right,” he laughs.


Nick laughs too. “You should’ve been there. He was such a sissy, crying and stuff.”


“ ‘Don’t hurt me, stop it!’ “ Jack imitates in a high pitched voice. He starts laughing again, then abruptly stops when James’ fist hits him hard in the face. He staggers backwards, knocking a desk over.


“What the f***, man?!” he shouts.


“James!” Mrs. Fields exclaims.


James stalks out of the classroom. They’re right, I should’ve been there, he thinks. To stop them.





He drives to the hospital, but Alex refuses to see him. He goes again the next day and the next day and the next, but the nurse turns him away every time . His ‘friends’ are now refusing to talk to him and giving him the same treatment as they did to Alex. Alex’s mom calls him and apologizes and tells him that she doesn’t know what’s come over Alex, ignoring his best friend like that. She also tells him that once she gets Alex to tell her who attacked him, she would be pressing charges.


“I know who it was.” James tells her.



Alex returns to school four weeks later, ribs mostly healed and bruise already faded. Mentally preparing himself for another day in h*ll as he trudges down the hallway, he’s surprised to see James standing in front of his locker.


“What do you want?” he asks brusquely.


James says, “I told your mother.”


Alex blinks. “What?”


“About who beat you up. Max and Nick and Jack got charged with assault, got suspended for two weeks, and got kicked off the football team too. Coach is really upset.”


“…oh.” Alex says.


“Why didn’t you tell her?” James asks.


Alex looks away. “They… they’re your friends and all, I didn’t want you to… get angry… or something…” he says, trailing off.


James looks at him incredulously for a moment, then exclaims, “Me? You were worried that I would be angry at you?”


“Yeah, well… sort of…” Alex says quietly, almost whispering.


James smiles and takes Alex’s hand. “You should give me more credit than that.” He says to the surprised Alex. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t think that they were capable of doing something like that. Please forgive me.”


Alex tilts his head and thinks for a moment. Then he smiles. “All right then. If you want me to forgive you, then kiss me. Right now, in front of everyone.”


And to Alex’s shock and pleasure, James did. I was only teasing. I would’ve forgiven you anyway, he thinks while everyone else in the hallway gawks.


Alex wraps his arms around James’ neck. But this is nice too.