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By LucyM, Kent, OH

[Note: Between every line, the camera cuts to a different person. Two people are not in the same shot at the same time unless otherwise specified. These shots alternate between WS, MS, and MCU, at the director's digression.]

RYAN: (steps up to frame)Ryan here, star of Action-Tastic 3: Revenge of the baby puncher; I'd like to assure you that no babies were harmed in the making of this film.

NATE: (Brandishing a baby doll) See? It's fake.

ELLY: Punching real babies is a crime.

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