I press my heels
far into my stirrups
and tighten my fingers
around the reins.

A brick wall
stands in front of me.
Towering over me,
mocking me,
knowing
that once I get close
I'll just pull on my reins
and turn my horse
in the other direction.
Wanting to prove it wrong
I transition from a trot
to a canter.

I can hear
my horse breathing
and the beating
of my heart
as his hooves lift up
from the ground.
The wind whips my face
and turns my cheeks red
and the rain
pours down on me,
soaking my hair
but I don't notice any of it.

I can't believe
I'm finally
above the jump,
looking down on it.
Before I know it
I'm back on the ground
cantering toward the wooden rail.
I lost my crop,
one of my feet
isn't in its stirrup anymore
and I'm falling
out of my saddle
but all I notice
is the smile across my face.