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Perseverant Nature
July 9, 2010
The wind blows roughly,
Angry, violent and wild,
Refusing to die.
Tree limbs fight the gusts
Warring with the gales of wind
Unwilling to fail.
An ant tugs a crumb,
Striving to reach the pile's top-
Not ready to fail.
A flawless flower
Tall among stifling weeds
Growing despite odds.
© Allison S., Eau Claire, WI
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 12 comments.
i absolutely LOVE the flower stanza! it makes me think of those little plants that grow in between rocks like on a mountain. its a PERFECT symbol. and i like the idea of combining haikus! this is such a beautiful poem, i'm gonna go read your other poems now :)
Lol. Yeah, all three of those lines were kind of stretched. I figured if Shakespeare could pull off adding accents on letters to make par with iambic pentameter, I could add a few syllables to words so they met haiku terms! :P Thanks for the comments and constructive criticism!
DiamondsIntheGrass GOLD said...
on Aug. 11 2010 at 7:37 pm
and also, i think "angry, violent and wild" is only 6. but this is really good. love the last stanza.
poeticspirit12334 PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 10 2010 at 2:29 pm
i ove this sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much it has real meaning adn it is a good meaning to!! love it!
MAX123 said...
on Aug. 8 2010 at 12:39 pm
tall among stifling weeds is only 6,
And to me altough some disagree, I the pile's is two syllables, but it depends, : )
That is all I caught. sorry that I made it sound like you totally messed up. but you didn't and I think that you did awe-some!!! : ) : )
MAX123 said...
on Aug. 6 2010 at 10:39 pm
Good!!! but it would be a free verse poem, because your "haikus" need to have 5 syllables in the first and third line and seven syllables in the second. not all of them had the right number. But I REALLY like the title and the way you veiw nature!!
ellyncannon PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 6 2010 at 9:05 am
:) :) :) :) I love love love it! You are definatley one talented writer poet girl!!! I really enjoy reading all your work! :P
