My life of Mistakes
If I had been born with hair,
Instead of being bald,
People may not have thought that my sister and I
Were girl-boy twins.
If I hadn’t kept asking for one inch shorter,
Then my sister wouldn’t have said
that I looked like Gene Simmons in my high school yearbook photo.
If I had realized that my dad was joking
When I asked him how much money to request
For my government internship application,
Then I would’ve requested no money,
instead of $400,000.
If I had been smarter,
Then I wouldn’t have danced the robot across the stage
With ginormous, teased hair in a Girl Scout lip sync contest.
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