The Truth About Sex
I’m on a mission to kill the birds and the bees.
The truth is, after we arrive screaming and slimy into this world of ours, I think our parents make three crucial about our lives the very first day after the laughing, crying, and crooning has settled down. For starters, they are: what we will be named, who’s stuck with potty-training duty, and the one with the shortest straw who has to give “the talk” at some point. Sure enough, “some point” arrives anywhere between we’re twelve and sixteen. Then it’s an all-out war over who wants to dig a hole in the carpet and die first: us or them.
Sex is fine playing over a radio in the newest rap song, but it certifiably counts as Chinese water torture if we have to discuss it with our parents.
Continue Reading »