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Beauty Within This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

Kristin H., Aspen, CO By exotus, Aspen, CO

It happened the summer I was 15. My friend and I were trapped inside on a rainy day, and she told me about a website where we could see and talk to boys we didn't know. My friend had always been outgoing, but the idea of strangers seeing me through a webcam scared me. But I foolishly went along with it anyway. At first, I stood in the background while she talked and flirted. Soon we came upon a group of boys our age, and I decided to try to be more like her, even try to impress her.

The boys told my friend that she was gorgeous. Then they saw my leg behind her and asked if I would show myself. I let her rotate the camera to me, and they immediately asked for her to come back on screen. “Your friend is really ugly,” one of them piped up, and the rest laughed. My friend flipped them off and abruptly ended the chat.

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2 comment(s)
Oh yes, I understand this completely. When I had friends I was always the ugly friend. Of course this wasn't said outright (although I've had plenty of people call me ugly throughout my life). But I could tell with the way my friends were treated vs. the way I was treated. Boys talked to them but never to me (though I tried to flirt with them just the same as they did). Now I've come to accept the fact that, yes, I am an ugly person and will probably never experience the great priviledge of falling in love. It would be different if people were more tolerant, or if we judged more on personality (because I do believe I am a kind person). Unfortunately, that isn't the way the world works, no matter how much we wish it did.
Apr. 01, 2014 at 1:31 PM • Report
I'm sure you're a beautiful person, inside and out. Really, people can be so cruel, but once their looks fade (and they inevitably will with age), they won't have anything beautiful about them. But you, you seem like a kind person, a person that has a lot to offer, and I wish you would believe me when I tell you that there will be someone someday who will see you for who you really are, not what's on the skin. 
Apr. 02, 2014 at 10:28 PM • Report