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Look Up For Me    (Continued)

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“Well …” I decide to ask him, “Do you ever feel like you're sitting in a crowded room – I mean, not like claustrophobic crowded but like crowded enough to feel a little uncomfortable – and everyone is talking and you scream. You scream so loud you feel like the sound reverberations might cause your throat to explode. You just keep screaming, but no one even looks up. Do you ever feel like that?”

“Are you asking if I ever feel invisible?”

He isn't listening to me.

“No. Do you ever feel like that? Like what I just described.” Luke's eyes roll around in their sockets. He says “no” firmly, then picks up his chemistry textbook.

I say, “Oh, okay,” but before the second syllable can even escape my mouth, Luke cuts me off.

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8 comment(s)
UponThePage
Beautiful. A simple exchange turned into a moment I'm sure all of us can relate to. Your ending is particularly powerful; great use of syntax. And it's true what you say here. People seldom notice those who stand before them until we scream. And then people can't help but look up. Keep up the great work :)
Jun. 09, 2014 at 2:15 PM • Report
TrishDestinyz
This is truly amazing, not only because its something most of us could really relate too, also your effortless writing styles are stunning!
May. 01, 2014 at 9:44 AM • Report
bookmouse
Your last sentence made my heart sto
Dec. 05, 2013 at 8:42 PM • Report
Alex_Mac
You have a clean writing style that I really enjoyed reading. It was a lovely piece that I'm sure everyone can relate to.
May. 03, 2013 at 11:35 AM • Report
JulieKate
Wow thank you! Very kind of you to say. Thanks for reading :)
May. 23, 2013 at 3:11 PM • Report
JulieKate
I based Luke on a boy I knew in high school. I made him roll his eyes and answer her question because I wanted to show how dismissive Luke is of her. He doesn't even want to think about her point of view, and the "no" just cuts off any development of conversation. I wrote their conversation this way because I often experienced the same kind of dismissiveness from this boy. I hope that helps!
May. 23, 2013 at 3:10 PM • Report
JulieKate
Thanks for reading :)
May. 23, 2013 at 3:12 PM • Report
JulieKate
Thanks for reading! :)
May. 23, 2013 at 3:12 PM • Report
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