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Eternity    (Continued)

He lowered himself onto the grass,holding his head up with his hand, his face turned toward the sun. He looked so perfectly at ease and so easily perfect that it was hard to believe he was even real. He was so lovely that it hurt to think of what he saw in me. The ordinariness of my humanity couldn’t possibly be endearing compared to the fantastical beauty of this faerie boy.

Yet there he was, utterly content to be with me. I wasn’t sure I’d ever understand, but I didn’t mind.Having him was more than enough. To ask for an explanation would be greedy. Still, I had to wonder if there had been others before me. After all, he’d been alive for three centuries. Certainly he hadn’t spent those years alone. It hurt to think of others holding his heart, and that others would, because, of course, I wouldn’t be around forever.

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26 comment(s)
wow is all I can say. I feel like I just read a scene from twilight. in some parts I feel like you just used the same words as in the meadow scene in twilight, but mostly it was good.
Jul. 07, 2016 at 7:17 PM • Report
You wrote that she made sure not to disturb his wings. His wings are body parts, are they not? It would be better if she could touch and hold them as she would his hands or leg or face, right?
Feb. 12, 2016 at 4:08 AM • Report
This is amazing for a romantic fiction! Puts a sad spin on eternity, but still made me practically beg for more! PLEASE CONTINUE THIS Caroline!
Jan. 21, 2016 at 11:47 AM • Report
It is really nice, and really good. Though, I would second all those who said that the story is really really close to Twilight. It is a great story, don't get me wrong, but, it would be best if you try to make it less like Twilight and more like your REAL style.
Dec. 30, 2015 at 4:36 AM • Report
I love it. It is very similar to Twilight, and that's great but, you could have changed it a little bit. Its pretty much an exact replica of the original and that is technically illegal
Oct. 03, 2015 at 2:31 PM • Report
I think that this story is sinfully close to twilight. Given its a short story and you do say you were inspired by twilight but this is practically hitting that copy and paste button. Also there is no character development other then the fact that they like each other so without one the other is lifeless and with eachother they are still bland. Sub pat
Apr. 10, 2015 at 10:24 AM • Report
LOL. That was funny
Aug. 04, 2015 at 9:55 PM • Report
"Its really good" said Alice.
Dec. 21, 2014 at 2:52 PM • Report
It was really well written.
Nov. 16, 2014 at 4:55 PM • Report
I think this is very well written, but some parts seemed almost like they were copied and pasted straight from Twilight.  While it's always great to use inspiration from other books while writing, try adding your own flair.  It's a great start, though :)
Aug. 14, 2014 at 5:05 PM • Report