Teen Ink

     To the one I gave my all and lost: I hope you know I am missing you to death. I am so sorry for walking out on you at the restaurant that day. I didn’t mean it. You were more than I ever asked for. I don’t know how I did that to you. You were always there for me, no matter what, and if I had simply thought twice before I got up and walked out that door ... you would still be here with me today.

It was after I left you that I realized my mistake, and quickly tried to undo what I had done, but it was too late. You were gone. I don’t blame you though; I probably would have done the same. Believe me when I say that leaving you was one of the biggest mistakes I’ve ever made. For nights after, I cried myself to sleep. I cried because all I could think about were our memories. I cried because I missed your touch. I cried because for the first time, you weren’t there to cry on. And between those tears, I prayed that you would return.

I know now that you are never coming back, and so I simply pray for your happiness. I pray that you have found another’s arms to hold you like they’ll never let go. That you love and are loved by someone who will never leave you the way I did. I pray that you make even more memories with that special someone than you did with me. I pray that you can hear my voice and know how much I regret what happened at the restaurant. I never wanted to lose you; I’m so sorry.

And though it was so long ago, I know that I will never forget you. I have tried to forget the pain that I feel without you by my side, but my heart continues to ache. I still miss you and our times dearly, but I want you to know that you are still with me. You will always be in my heart, and I will never let go of what we had. It’s hard to believe that you had such an impact on my life. And it’s even harder to believe that the one I once spent every second with was suddenly gone, just like that. The past is the past, though, and I know I must learn to deal with your absence.

I know you may not like what I’m saying and still hate me for what I did, but just let me tell you two last things and then I’m done. First, don’t ever let anyone walk all over you or walk out on you the way I did. You are much too good for that. Second, please don’t ever forget me or the time we shared. If you have already forgotten, at least remember, Sparkles, you were the greatest teddy bear a girl could ever ask for.