The True Definition of Perfect | Teen Ink

The True Definition of Perfect

September 22, 2009
By Anonymous

After I had to break-up with him, I thought I wouldn’t be able to be okay again, but turns out I can be a complete person without him or anyone else. I have learned so much from the break-up, and so many other things in these past two weeks. From a break-up with a guy I thought I loved, to going to a new church- where for the first time in my life I feel like I belong, to admitting to my friends what religion I am, and having them accept me anyways.

These past two weeks have flown by. It feels like it was just yesterday that I told the guy goodbye. It feels like just yesterday that I had my first day at church. It feels like just yesterday that I told my best friends who I really am. For the first time ever I feel like I am whole, I don’t need anything but what I have. I actually talk in school. I’m not that shy girl I once was. I have the break-up, but also my new church family, to thank for that.

Today I said something stupid. I misunderstood an assignment, and told my friend about the incorrect thing I thought. As I was walking down the hall my mind started to go that place it used to go to, where I obsess over how dumb I sounded and my face turns permanently red, and I feel awful for the rest of the day. Then I realized that I’m human, I am allowed to make mistakes. I’m allowed to say something stupid, no apologies. I’ve never thought that before. My attitude was always, I am horrible, time to blush massively.

I feel so strong, so confident, and so powerful. I feel like I can be myself for the first time. I have actually been scolded at school for talking with my friends, that’s a first too. I’ve realized that the only person my beliefs and goals need to make happy, is me. No one else has a say in my thoughts.

Before, I let my friends believe that I was like them, that I believed like them. Now they know who I am and they are okay with it. It feels so good to just be me. It feels so good to not care what other people think. It is like a huge weight has been lifted. I have cared so much for so many years.

I am so glad I had to break-up with him. I am so glad I had this opportunity for growth. I think my mom is right, high school relationships aren’t forever, they are practice, and the point is for teens to learn and grow, not become really, permanently attached. I feel like if I hadn’t broken-up with him it would have taken me so much longer to get to this place of self-worth, and value. My whole world has changed in the best way.

My new church is also part of this. I joined a Unitarian Universalist church, which is basically a church that isn’t for just one religion, is inclusive, and believes in positive social action. I feel like I belong there. I am part of something beyond myself. I am growing, and learning so much, and it is all on me to pick what exactly I believe.

My friends at school are the best people in the world. They don’t mind me being me, which is something I’ve always been scared to be. I’ve been scared to just be me. Now my friends and I are closer than ever. I feel like I belong there too.

Everything is falling into place. Two weeks ago, I wasn’t a member of a church, my friends thought I was somewhat different than what I am, and I had a boyfriend. I felt perfect then, but what I had was nowhere near what I really needed. Now I have the best friends, who I am close to, and a church, where I belong, and no boyfriend. My life right now is the true definition of perfect. What I have now is what I really need. Some other guy will come along someday, and if one doesn’t for a while, well I’m okay with that too. I’m happy with just me and the people and things I love.



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This article has 8 comments.


on May. 24 2012 at 10:26 pm
AubreyJordan PLATINUM, Flagstaff, Arizona
25 articles 0 photos 39 comments

Okay, so this part right here:

"Today I said something stupid. I misunderstood an assignment, and told my friend about the incorrect thing I thought. As I was walking down the hall my mind started to go that place it used to go to, where I obsess over how dumb I sounded and my face turns permanently red, and I feel awful for the rest of the day. Then I realized that I’m human, I am allowed to make mistakes. I’m allowed to say something stupid, no apologies. I’ve never thought that before. My attitude was always, I am horrible, time to blush massively."

...It's like you literally extracted the emotions inside me and splattered them onto paper (well "paper," I guess.) Excellent, amazing, PERFECT job. Needless to say, I can relate. Yay for being single!

Now that I've stopped hating myself for every little mistake, it's like I've entered this state of anti-depression. Constant happiness. It's this wonderful feeling of acceptance. 

Who needs drugs when you can be high on life!

(P.S. Read my stuff? I hate pestering people this way... but validation is nice)


on Apr. 2 2011 at 1:12 pm
ambermoore GOLD, Boone, Iowa
10 articles 1 photo 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live.Laugh.Love
Drag my name through the mud & I still come out clean-lil wayne

This sounds just like my life right now!<3

Sail_ BRONZE said...
on Dec. 13 2010 at 11:59 am
Sail_ BRONZE, Eugene, Oregon
3 articles 10 photos 196 comments
yeah i really liked this story because it is so true! i don't know why people don't see things this way; that they think they have to have someone in their life to be whole. i have many friends, but i am myself and if they don't like that...they aren't worth it.

on Sep. 16 2010 at 10:07 am
SingleGal SILVER, Huntsville, Arkansas
5 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
PEACE LOVE DEATH

lol ya really.

on Oct. 5 2009 at 3:53 pm
oh my goodness when i saw this picture i was like i dont remeber taking this picture

and then i relized it wasnt me it is crazy weird how much me and whoever that picture is of look so much alike extremely weird

on Oct. 5 2009 at 11:51 am
i like this story cause its true

on Oct. 5 2009 at 11:50 am
i really like this story cause its true

LilBellaX69 said...
on Oct. 5 2009 at 11:49 am
This pic. Looks Just like my friend melin

I swear like no joke i showed it to her.