I'm Me | Teen Ink

I'm Me

July 26, 2010
By OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch


I’m used to it by now. How couldn’t I be? The looks, the sneers, whispers you’ve thought I couldn’t hear. Well, I could.

Of course I know I’m different. I’ve lived with myself my whole life—shocker, isn’t it? I would have to have much less intelligence than I possess to not realize how estranged from others I really am.

You pass snide remarks about my clothes. I apologize that I haven’t worn the “in” clothing that you always do, which tends to cut off your circulation. But if it’s popular, and it’s pretty, you decide it’s worth the discomfort. I never thought so.

My mind—it must run on a different station than everyone else’s. Maybe I’m like Bella. I’m on FM while everyone else is on AM. Or maybe I’m just not tuned into the radio at all.

I don’t feel the need to speak the way you do, laugh the way you do, flirt the way you do. I see a guy, and I may note if he looks cute—nothing more. I feel no urge to run up, giggling and flashing to him, and start picking on him in a way that somehow is supposed to indicate that I like him.

Sure, I’m more intelligent than most, perhaps all of you. I can’t help it. I don’t like it. That doesn’t change anything. But the intelligence isn’t really what matters. Yes I thought so, for a while. But there are others who are intelligent, and they get along just fine…no, that’s not it.

It’s me. I see the world differently than you do. And I like the way I see it. I’m not about to change my views because of some of humanity’s strange notions.

Why do you cover yourself in those foul-smelling chemicals and pastes, that make you look more like a piece of art than a human being? I simply don’t see the appeal. You look down on me for this. I really couldn’t care. Must I make my curly brown hair curlier? My bright brown eyes more vivid? My long, dark lashes more emphasized? I don’t see why. I look fine the way I am.

I talk funny. That’s what you always tell me. I talk like an old person. Not really. Just because I choose to use larger words, am I incomprehensible? Doubtful. You just want something else to tease me with. You’ve got it.

No, I’m not a teacher’s pet merely because I answer the questions you seem too busy to care about, or because I speak to them after class occasionally. So what if I’m a writer? It’s really none of your business.

You know what? I used to care. I used to cry. I cry not only when I’m sad, but when I’m angry, did you know that? Of course you didn’t, you never cared enough to find out. But I don’t cry anymore. If my eyes are over-bright, it’s because I’ve just gotten an idea. One that you’ll never have. Or maybe it’s just because I’m comfortable with myself—which is more than you can say.

So I’ll keep my strange clothing, my strange views, my unadorned face, my way of speaking. And if you don’t like it? Too bad.


The author's comments:
This was just venting. Writing is my way of venting. I felt much better after writing this. And every word of it is true.

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This article has 53 comments.


on Sep. 5 2010 at 4:04 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Thanks:D OK.

on Sep. 5 2010 at 10:57 am
darkangle56 BRONZE, Antioch, Illinois
4 articles 3 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;a wise girl kiss but never loves, listens but doesnt believe, and leaves before she is left&quot;

yes i could do better but im a very gudd writter juss i dnt like tu spell things out all te tyme but i loved chur piece

on Sep. 2 2010 at 7:49 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Sure! Thanks.

on Sep. 2 2010 at 7:43 pm
SimplyRachel PLATINUM, Charlotte, North Carolina
48 articles 6 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift, that&#039;s why we call it the present.&quot;<br /> ~Unknown<br /> &quot;Things change, friends leave, and life doesn&#039;t stop for anybody.&quot;<br /> ~Stepgen Chbosky

I know how you feel. Writing is my way of venting too. Especally helps when things like tht happen to me. Check out some of my work and tell me what you think.

on Aug. 28 2010 at 4:28 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

I'm glad you were able to relate:) Thank you.

on Aug. 28 2010 at 4:13 pm
singing4ever GOLD, San Francisco, California
16 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Those who wish to sing always find a song.&quot; And, as a close second, &quot;I have always imagined that Paradise will be some kind of library.&quot;

Inspiring, and completely relatable. I think that's how many of us feel here on Teen Ink. Thanks so much for putting this out here.

on Aug. 27 2010 at 12:30 am
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Haha thanks!

Brynn BRONZE said...
on Aug. 26 2010 at 6:27 pm
Brynn BRONZE, Aubrey, Texas
3 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It&#039;s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don&#039;t keep your feet, there&#039;s no knowing where you might be swept off to.&quot; ~Bilbo Baggins

FINALLY! Someone that agrees with everything I write down and then throw away because I don't want my snooping older sister to see it!

You are my new favorite!


on Aug. 9 2010 at 4:05 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Thank you! I know,  I REALLY appreciate it:D

on Aug. 9 2010 at 4:04 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Haha thanks:D

Erudite GOLD said...
on Aug. 9 2010 at 12:28 pm
Erudite GOLD, Rawalpindi, Other
19 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
trust your heart<br /> if the seas catch fire<br /> (and live by love<br /> though the stars walk backward)

WOW..nice!! i liked the way u wrote it! your one of my fave writers, i have like read most of your stories! :D

on Aug. 9 2010 at 12:20 pm
Imaginedangerous PLATINUM, Riverton, Utah
31 articles 0 photos 402 comments
Honestly, the average teenage girl is one of the things on this planet that annoys me the most. Good job.

on Aug. 7 2010 at 8:58 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Haha yeah it was, but thanks April!

AniJulia said...
on Aug. 6 2010 at 7:21 pm
AniJulia, Dollard-Des-Ormeaux, Other
0 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
You make the bed that you lay on.

I think I'vealready read this somewhere, was it on a TI forum? I don't know but all I can say is that I absolutely love it!

on Aug. 2 2010 at 9:18 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Thanks! :D

on Aug. 2 2010 at 9:11 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Thanks! :D 

on Aug. 2 2010 at 8:43 pm
TabbiJane PLATINUM, Rockwood, Michigan
27 articles 26 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.&quot;<br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> --Albus Dumbledore

I really love this article. The raw emotion that you put into it was wonderful.

on Aug. 2 2010 at 6:16 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Thanks:D 

on Aug. 2 2010 at 6:10 pm
ithinkijustflew BRONZE, Dreamland, Other
4 articles 1 photo 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
Is. 43:2; When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.

A really beautiful, real article. True to life. Well done ;)

on Aug. 2 2010 at 8:35 am
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1752 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker<br /> We cannot change the cards we&#039;re dealt just how we play the hand<br /> Experience is what you get when you didn&#039;t get what you wanted<br /> It&#039;s pretty easy to be smart when you&#039;re parroting smart people<br /> -Randy Pausch

Thanks! :D