Irrational Fears | Teen Ink

Irrational Fears

May 28, 2014
By Emma Samuelson BRONZE, Cannon Falls, Minnesota
Emma Samuelson BRONZE, Cannon Falls, Minnesota
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

In 2012 I was with my dad in our dusty maroon Ford pickup, making our way to Outing, Minnesota. We were on our way to a famous, one of a kind cabin. It wasn't going to be just us. Oh no, quite the contrary, at least thirty kids and ten dads were going. This cabin is full of chaos, laughter, and rambunctious kids. I was practically screaming with anticipation. When we finally reached our destination, it was time to reacquaint ourselves with old friends. We gave our greetings and said our “hello’s” and “how do you do’s”. When we got settled all the kids began to plan what we would do for the next three days. We could; jet ski, fish, or go tubing. There was still tons of stuff left to do. I was almost bouncing off the walls to go tubing but, it wasn't always like that.
In 2010 a couple years back I was at the very same cabin. It was the second day and I had just woken up with bedhead and groggy eyes, but I did not care. I knew today would be the day that I went tubing for the first time. Of course I was excited, who wouldn't be? When we got to the dock I decided that Ella and I were going to pair up. It was her first time as well. We decided to take the jet ski which is mild compared to a speed boat and we prefered to go super slow. Like the dare-devils we were, we hopped onto the bright orange tiger-tube with all of the confidence in the world. Before we knew it the tube lurched into action. I was holding on to that tiger-tube for my life. After a couple seconds I got the hang of things and I was actually enjoying it. Putting my thumbs up to go faster I was ready. But then something funny happened. The tube began to sink. The driver didn't realize it at first and he was driving care-free. Ella and I on the other hand were anything but care-free. A hasty wall of water came too fast, filling my mouth and dragging me under. Fortunately, I was wearing a life jacket and I bobbed right back up as did Ella. But I never forgot that day and the irrational fear as I refused to go on any other tube for the rest of the trip. Until now.
It was the second day of being at the cabin in 2012. We all rode on the pontoon that was attached to the pickup and drove to the lake. It was only a minute away. As I leaped off the boat and walked to the unstable dock I was ready. I wanted to be like all the other kids and have fun out on the lake. I didn't want to go on the jet ski. I wanted to be fearless and go on the speed boat. I had volunteered first so there would be no way of turning back. Annika, one of my closest friends, decided that she would go with me. When we hopped onto the same bright orange tiger-tube it felt like the tiger was mocking me. But I quickly shoved that thought away and focused on holding onto the handles for my life. The tube gave a familiar tug and then we were speeding off. I had an iron grip on those handles and I was not planning to let go. After awhile my irrational fear started to fade, I was beginning to forget.
I didn't realize that my eyes were sealed shut. I slowly opened my eyes and saw bright white light until my eyes adjusted. It felt like I was going 100 mph like a speed boat racer. That moment was exhilarating. My feet skidded off the water and my hair blew in the wind. Water droplets sprayed in my face and my grip loosened on the handles. Surprisingly, I was having the time of my life. My irrational fear vanished right when the tube gave that familiar tug. I finally felt like all the other kids, like I belonged there. Whooping and hollering to go faster I acted like a mad man. I did not want it to end. Working up the courage I gave the signal to do a swirly. (Swirlys are when the boat goes in circles causing gargantuan waves.) Almost losing my swimsuit bottoms I held on for dear life. Waves came rolling up out of nowhere crossing our tubes path. Bumping, flying, and flopping we made our way through. Gliding through the water and nearing our final destination, I completely let go of the handles. Almost sad of getting back to the dock, I thought about how proud I was of myself of overcoming my fear.
That night went by in a flash with; a bonfire, a cookout, and a good night’s sleep. The next morning I raced to get dressed and eat. Undoubtedly, I wanted to go tubing again. Although breakfast did look delicious, I couldn't wait to get to the lake. Shoveling waffles, eggs, and bacon in my mouth, I didn't wait to savor each bite. Impatient as I am I made sure everyone went as fast as they could to get ready. Ten agonizing minutes later we were finally heading back out to the lake. After they lowered the boats I immediately galloped to the tubing boat. Katie and I were going to be the third ones this time so we had to wait another ten agonizing minutes. When the time came we both leaped onto to the tiger-tube and took our turn. Certainly, that wasn't the only tube that I went on the next tube I went on was a taco shaped tube. Deliberately, I even hopped off right into the rushing water. Big Bertha was the last tube that day that I went on. This massive tube could fit close to 15 kids without having us all fall off or sink below with the weight. Although going on that tube was scary I realized that I now can go on many different kinds of tubes. I stood up against my fears while going to this cabin and I think I learned immensely from that experience.
All fears are irrational, they arise with the thought of future outcomes of that fear. What I learned from that experience was to stand up to those fears no matter how ridiculous they seem to be. Fear of spiders and snakes are some of the many irrational fears there are in the world. People just have to learn to stand up to them and not cower away at the sight of them. “What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it.” This was quoted by Jiddu Krishnamurti. In 2010 I escaped from that fear but, in 2012 I took it head on. Overall, I am glad that I was courageous enough to jump on that tiger-tube a second time and learn that it is a total BLAST.



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