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HomeInto the Unknown
Into the Unknown
Summary: Kimberly Grace William life is completely normal. The only drama she's forced to handle is her annoying triplet brothers, and the occasional flirtacious actions of her highschool's jock Luke Shields.
But Kimberly's world is turned upside down and twisted around when her family decides to move from the cozy house they currently reside in, located in Florida, to halfway across the country to freezing Alaska.
Overwhelmed by the sudden change, Kimberly runs away from her family in one last desperate attempt to stay in the Sunshine State. Finally, she comes across the woods just outside her house people have claimed to hear wails and screams admitting from.
Despite that, she enters boldly, but little did she know that her best friend Maria Campbell happened to be following her. They argue, and eventually engage in a fight involving a flurry of nails and fists. Kimberly knocks her friend into a nearby pond, and is dragged in with her.
When they surface they're not met by the woods they were in previously before, but instead a beautiful golden field.
They're not in Florida anymore.
The two best friends enter this new world without of clue on how they got there. Loyalty, friendship, and trust will be tested as they venture through this mysterious land in hope to get home, and mystical abilities they never thought possible will arise. The magic and light of the land is wonderful, but where there is light, there is darkness: and the darkness might be something the two friends won't be able to hande.
But Kimberly's world is turned upside down and twisted around when her family decides to move from the cozy house they currently reside in, located in Florida, to halfway across the country to freezing Alaska.
Overwhelmed by the sudden change, Kimberly runs away from her family in one last desperate attempt to stay in the Sunshine State. Finally, she comes across the woods just outside her house people have claimed to hear wails and screams admitting from.
Despite that, she enters boldly, but little did she know that her best friend Maria Campbell happened to be following her. They argue, and eventually engage in a fight involving a flurry of nails and fists. Kimberly knocks her friend into a nearby pond, and is dragged in with her.
When they surface they're not met by the woods they were in previously before, but instead a beautiful golden field.
They're not in Florida anymore.
The two best friends enter this new world without of clue on how they got there. Loyalty, friendship, and trust will be tested as they venture through this mysterious land in hope to get home, and mystical abilities they never thought possible will arise. The magic and light of the land is wonderful, but where there is light, there is darkness: and the darkness might be something the two friends won't be able to hande.
SweetDreamer78
I think this story is great and can't wait to read more of it and the first part ended on a really good cliffhanger. I hope you continue it soon!!!
Important Note: Just so you all know, this book is currently placed on pause due to the process of deconstruction and starting over. This is a fairly old draft with several flaws and writing mistakes, yet - for now - I'm choosing not to delete it since it's recieved so many positive ratings (I don't even understand how). I'm not sure when a recent version will be submitted, but please don't think of this novel as the best-of-my-ability.
Thank you.
~ForeverWonderland
Laura_Oliverdon't understand how it got so many good ratings? Its not the grammar or punctuation or overuse of 'the' and 'it' that matters. It's the story. I love this.
though if you edited this (and I mean a lot of editing) you could come out with something really spectacular. It's like a weedy garden with the world's ripest juciest tomatos (without being mushy though)
whispersofthenightAre you gonna post the new version of this when you have enough of it?
Yep! :) Because, as you know, I hate this version. </3
Don't hate it D: It's good! (Well, not as good as the new ver, probably, but still.)
MasterZoneThat sentence in the preview:
They're not in Florida anymore.
Reminds me of the Wizard of Oz:
"I'm not in Kansas anymore."
Now, onto reading the novel, lol.
Ha, yeah, it's a small bit of allusion :)
Thanks for reading! <3 I'll probably be starting over this novel soon, for I'm not at all satisfied with the way it turned out. It's one of my older pieces, so I plan to revise it. :) Plus, the plot is going to go under a bit of developement.
Coffeecongrats on being #1 of the day!
MirandaFantasyHaha I love Kimberly :) good job so far! Can't wait to read more~
OfficialApprover
Okay. I'm telling you right up front that I'm going to be completely honest with you. If you want sugar coating, don't read this.
I do like the premise. Your pitch was decent, though you gave a bit too much detail. We don't need to know everything that happens to her, just the gist of it.
So you start off with a pitch about her and her friend disappearing into another world, and you start it off with...Algebra class.&nbs... (more »)
No, it's alright, I'm happy you wrote the super long comment of advice ^^ You're right to be honest, and I'l try to fix everything you suggested. I'll probaby end up starting competely over at one point, because I usually do often, so I'll be sure to avoid the probems my writing currently has.
And there isn't actually a love triangle thing going on (not my thing) but I do SEE where you can get that by the way it was written.
But anyway, thanks for the comment :)
No problem:) I'm trying to help people improve. I'm glad it didn't offend you--I wasn't trying to be mean, just honest.
Unsent_LettersOfficialApprover...will you please review my novel-in-progress? Please?
Ahahaha, poor Kimberly.
I personally love this book, even though you aren't very far through.
Leann13im already hooked:) great story so far!!! i willl def read it all. i love your realistic characters! some of the connotation is off (in my opinion) but trust me u have a future in writing! u sure know how to draw a reader in! please read some of my stuff when they finally accept it... its been pending forever it seems. but really, i would love some constructive critisism! i know i need tips!
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