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White Ribbon

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Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 ... 12 Next »

Chestnut Brown

The magnificence of a horse can never be understated, especially to someone who has never seen one. The creature bewildered me. Its chestnut velvet coat delighted me. Its dirty, mangled mane enchanted me. So when our captors loaded us onto horses, each of us secured by our own armed guard, I was not frightened exactly. I was amazed.

Our hands were already bound, so I figured fighting back would be futile, but Gia made a valiant effort. I reached out when they loaded Ori onto a spotted horse, separate from mine, but I told him not to give them the satisfaction of seeing him cry. I was tired of crying anyway. Ori impressed me with his obedience, assuming a sullen pout that he stubbornly maintained throughout the journey.

The captors were about half a dozen in all, spread amongst the same number of horses. They were intriguing, rugged, and strong. They rode horses and carried sticks for weapons. Their lips constrained their yellow teeth from falling from their faces. Their yelps, their animal signals, seemed anything but human. They were primitive. They were barbarian. I had little doubt that these were Suprema.

On any other day I would have been terrified. But today I felt that I’d already been spared so many times that my death was overdue. I saw a concentrated tremor on Gia’s brow. She had not yet consigned herself to death. She was looking for weakness, absorbing information the way my father did. I knew she was thinking that if only she jumped of the horse at the next ridge…if she elbowed her guard and ran off…if she built a shelter in the woods…if she collected nuts and berries…then she might escape and survive on her own. I admired her resilience, but I could not think that way. I wanted to free myself and I probably had the strength, but if I ever did escape alone, I would never forgive myself. I had to protect my sister and brother. They were all I had left.

The captors had laughed when they saw that our hands were already bound. The speaker was intelligent; he had pointed his sticks at Ori, and although I had never seen a bow and arrow, I shivered to think of the force it might impart. The other Suprema warriors attacked from the bushes. The youngest seemed smaller than Gia, and the oldest was no more than five years my senior.

Red handprints colored their faces. Only one warrior, whose tall stature and solemn expression indicated his authority, wore a black handprint over the right side of his face. He remained apart from the others, ever stoic. His short commands were quickly obeyed. Even I could tell that his horse, black and young, was the best of the bunch.

At first a young Suprema had attempted to capture my sister, but she overpowered him, and the largest warrior had to come to subdue her. One of his bulky arms fastened around her waist as they rode. When she tried to move, he squeezed her until she quieted.

The arm around my waist was tight and strong, but my Suprema, a muscular warrior at least my age, allowed me to turn my head and even to look in his face. He wore brown cotton pants and a loose cream-colored cotton shirt, just like most of the others. And, like the rest, he maintained a bow across his shoulder and arrows on his back. I saw the hilt of a dagger sticking out from a leather pouch on his side.

But something in his eyes told me that he was different. I only dared to steal quick glances, but he led the horse with certain…tenderness. As I sat entrapped by his warm arms I noticed a comfort in the way he sat. His green eyes pierced me when I glanced into his face, and the corners of his mouth began to softly smile.

As we rode my terror subsided. I didn’t feel frightened anymore. I looked over at Gia, struggling intently against her oversized hunter, but I enjoyed the warmth of my warrior’s arm hugging my waist. My warrior. I liked the way it sounded in my head. Now, for the first time in what seemed like ages, I didn’t feel afraid. I felt safe.

My warrior pulled me close to his body. He leaned his head over my shoulder. “Are you hungry?” he asked softly.

I had been trying not to think about food. My circumstances gave me a lot else to think about, but I hadn’t had a meal since breakfast the morning before. I wondered how Ori hadn’t complained yet. I nodded my head.

My warrior switched hands on the reigns and reached into a pouch on the horse. He handed me a small roll of bread. I held it to my lips with both hands bound and ate in small pieces, allowing the roll to expand in my stomach. I had no idea when I would eat my next meal.

My warrior laughed. “You eat like a little otter!” he exclaimed, smiling. “Are you thirsty, Otter?”

I almost smiled as I drank from his canteen.

I wished to hear his voice again, but we rode the rest of the way in silence. He drove the horse with elegance and grace. My breath caught every time the pace quickened, and my senses jumped when he readjusted his arm.

Gia caught my eye. Her angry confusion soured my cheerfulness. She couldn’t understand how I could find peace amidst this chaos. I didn’t really understand it myself.

Too suddenly the horses leaped from the trees into a huge clearing. If I had been looking for it I never would have found it. Cabins, plants, trees, and cloth seemed to breathe together in this place, slowly and collectively.

The people, on the other hand, pulsed with a strange and primitive vitality. Their eyes widened at our entrance and their hands froze in their work. Immediately the air burst with whoops and yips. Old men and young women, children and men, each cheered in their own way, barking and yelling. One woman started to sing.

“Judd! Mud Judd!” they shouted. “What have you found?”

The warrior with the black handprint dismounted his horse.

“I must talk with the chief,” he said. He turned to the warrior holding my brother. “Eamon, come with me.”
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 ... 12 Next »


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This book has 86 comments. Post your own!

randumfaveThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 1, 2012 at 9:10 am:

This is a cool story. I'm only halfway through right now, I just finished chapter six. I noticed a few flaws, but not many. One was the pace was slightly too fast for my taste, because, think about it this way: when you go to barnes and noble or borders and buy a nice new book, it will take a while to get into the action, but in here, it's pretty much just the first chapter and then bang comes the action. Likewise between action, such as when Arcana and her siblings escape the police, it take... (more »)

 
randumfaveThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Apr. 1, 2012 at 2:42 pm :
Well... I kept reading a little bit, and they have guns... so scratch that :p
 
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Eisdnyl14 said...
Oct. 18, 2011 at 11:36 am:
This is great! You are very talented, well done!
 
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RhythmAndRhyme said...
Jul. 1, 2011 at 11:16 am:

I spent days reading this over and over again. The plot haunted me throughout the instances when I was not reading the actual words. This was extremely well written, and I'd love if you continued the story!

I almost feel bad saying that I couldn't actually find anything to remedy with constructive criticism. I feel that way because someone might think that I'm only making them feel good when there's actually something there to fix. In this instance, that is not true! This work was trul... (more »)

 
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Midnight_Hum This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 1, 2011 at 8:21 am:
Wow...
I'm sorry I took so long to comment.  I searched for 'White Ribbon' and I couldn't find it, then Teen Ink re-added the 'My Contributions' thingy and I was able to find it instantly.
Just for the record, I NEVER reply to comments asking me to read their story. But you compared my story to "The Lady or the Tiger" which not only flattered me and made my big head swell, but also impressed me that you had heard of it.
Because that was definitely an inspiration to my story.<... (more »)
 
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Midnight_Hum This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 1, 2011 at 8:20 am:

Wow...

I'm sorry I took so long to comment.  I searched for 'White Ribbon' and I couldn't find it, then Teen Ink re-added the 'My Contributions' thingy and I was able to find it instantly.

Just for the record, I NEVER reply to comments asking me to read their story. But you compared my story to "The Lady or the Tiger" which not only flattered me and made my big head swell, but also impressed me that you had heard of it.

Because that was definately an inspiration to m... (more »)

 
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lalagirlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
May 24, 2011 at 5:03 pm:
This is sooo great! The world you've made is captivating and keeps me wanting more. Keep writing!
 
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becauseHeloves said...
May 23, 2011 at 9:44 am:
This is GOOD. I'm eagerly awaiting more chapters!
 
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flyingpinkgiraffesThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 27, 2011 at 2:56 pm:
Oh wow this has to be one of the best BOOKS ive read.  i mean im comparing it to profesional published books, not books on teenink!
 
EmilyGram replied...
Apr. 27, 2011 at 4:06 pm :
Thank you so much!  Your comment really motivates me to write.  I appreciate it so much.  Thank you :)
 
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Gabby J. said...
Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:15 pm:
Wow, i'm pretty new to teenink, but this is one of the best things I have looked at! I love how suspenseful it is, I can't wait for the next chapters!
 
EmilyGram replied...
Apr. 24, 2011 at 10:39 pm :

Thank you!  I'm glad you like it and that you commented!

 

 
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Medina D. said...
Apr. 17, 2011 at 9:02 am:
hey Emily! i know its random, but I'm really serious i had a weird dream last night.............i was seeing titles of published books from teenink writers, and the one i remember (from seeing your novel on the front page of novels) was  "White ribbon" I'm not joking AT ALL. :) Have a good day!! This book is awesome
 
EmilyGram replied...
Apr. 17, 2011 at 11:12 am :
haha that's awesome! :) I'm glad you shared that with me!
 
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Violets said...
Apr. 15, 2011 at 12:29 pm:

OMG this was totally awesome!!! This shoudl be a book...i would totally buy it!!!!!

 

 
EmilyGram replied...
Apr. 16, 2011 at 7:30 pm :
Thank you so much.  Your feedback really helps to motivate me to keep writing!
 
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wordjunkie said...
Apr. 9, 2011 at 6:07 pm:
Written well and descriptive! I couldn't read the whole thing, but I loved what  did.
 
EmilyGram replied...
Apr. 16, 2011 at 7:29 pm :
I'm glad you like it so far!  Please keep reading and let me know what you think :)
 
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jbaker0184This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:43 pm:
Very Interesting story Emily.  I realy liked where you went with it.  My name is Jake and I want you to stay in touch with me.  I may need help with my novel.
 
EmilyGram replied...
Mar. 30, 2011 at 3:04 pm :
Hi Jake!  I would love to help you out with your novel!  That's what this site is for :)  Any specific feedback you can give me about White Ribbon so far would be greatly appreciated as well!
 
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