If I kissed you... | Teen Ink

If I kissed you...

March 20, 2012
By KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown


Summary:

The killer turned his head to me, his dark, chiseled face giving me a small grin. “I'm going to kill your weak little boyfriend.” he breathed, trying to get me to react. I did, not caring, shaking my head no, pleading with my eyes.
“Hah!” he laughed at me and wrapped his large hands around John's throat. Tears streamed down my face. “NO! NO!”
And then the shears were planted into his shoulder. He let out a roar of anger as he fell back, off John his head landing near my feet. I raised my feet and landed them, hard as I could on his skull. His head re-vibrated off the floor boards and settled back as his eyes slowly closed. John ran to me ripping off the tape, I screamed from the pain. “John he's tied us all up! Get the shears, baby, get the shears!”


Katherine A.

If I kissed you...


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This book has 130 comments.


NickyJ BRONZE said...
on Mar. 24 2012 at 11:28 pm
NickyJ BRONZE, Hyde Park, New York
1 article 0 photos 138 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;In three words I can sum up everything I&#039;ve learned about life: it goes on.&rdquo; ~Robert Frost

I read the whole thing. How very Morbid o.e

I can't say I like it, but its written well in places.

KateLA GOLD said...
on Mar. 24 2012 at 9:41 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Thank you! :-)

on Mar. 24 2012 at 9:27 pm
torilynn400 GOLD, Poughkeepsie, New York
10 articles 1 photo 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.&quot;<br /> -President Franklin Delano Roosevelt

I only read two pages but what I read was awesome! I wanna read the rest! I've got this strange fascination with the storyline and how everything will end. Great job!

KateLA GOLD said...
on Mar. 24 2012 at 7:38 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Thank you so much! That really means a lot to me, you're the first one outside of my family to say that they're interested in my writing, so thank you :-)

on Mar. 24 2012 at 7:30 pm
Tatiel PLATINUM, Washington, Vermont
23 articles 21 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.<br /> ~Mark Twain

...*comments yet again* =P

I ditched my giant worldview essay and finished reading this. =D Hehe. And I am definitely interested in reading a part two, should you write/post it. =)) Your writing is very engaging =)


KateLA GOLD said...
on Mar. 24 2012 at 6:58 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

It's no problem :-)

on Mar. 24 2012 at 6:29 pm
Tatiel PLATINUM, Washington, Vermont
23 articles 21 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.<br /> ~Mark Twain

Ohhhhhh I see. That makes a lot more sense. =P I was under the impression that the girl was the one who hurt him with the shears. I get it now! Haha. Looking back, I see that you don't say anything about the girl hurting him with them. I think I just assumed that's who it was, because you don't say specifically who does it, and she is the one narrating. Thank you for explaining. =P

KateLA GOLD said...
on Mar. 24 2012 at 6:25 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Thank you for your comment!I like your comments they're always very positive :) I think you may have read it a little too fast, so I'll give you a quick description of what happened:

John and the killer fight and the killer's shears are knocked out of his hands, then John is on the ground getting pummeled by the killer, and as he tries to strangle John, John finds the shears and sticks them in the killer's shoulder. That's when the killer falls back and Kim knocks him out with her feet while still tied to the bedframe. She then yells at John to get the shears because she is tied up and so he jerked them out of the killer's shoulder and cuts her free. Then when he goes to cut free Maleah and Jen, but the killer is no longer unconcious and attacks all over again (killer is basically running on adrenaline), but they still manage to escape though they are forced to leave behind Maleah and Jen. By the time they are out of there they hear them screaming, but they don't go back because they know that they'll die too if they do, and so they basically make the split-second decision to run and save themselves.

 


on Mar. 24 2012 at 2:25 pm
Tatiel PLATINUM, Washington, Vermont
23 articles 21 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.<br /> ~Mark Twain

Wowwwwwww. This is SO good. =)) I have only read the first two pages, but what I've seen so far is amazing! I will have to see if I can make time to read the rest...=D Very nice!

I love the flashback. Flashback and dreams. Those are both two amazing things, if done well. ;) Hehe =)

The only criticism I have is about the first conflict with the killer in the very beginning. If the girl (Kim? I love your name choices, btw. =)) Especially Maleah) is tied up, how does she get the shears in her hand to hit the killer with them? Also, how does the killer then recover so fast from such a wound and attack John? And why do John and Kim leave the other two girls? That part just doesn't seem right to me...It doesn't seem like something your characters would do. But I'm not the author, so obviously you know them better than me ;)

REALLY good, though! =D I very much enjoyed it. ...and I really want to finish it nowwwww. O_O *looks at schedule*...hmmm...hehe =P