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Infomercial This piece has been published in Teen Ink's monthly print magazine.

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By Ariel E., Goose Creek, SC
More by this author
Photo credit: Zoelle M., Boston, MA
I’m here today to talk to you about obesity among the fast-food industries. Once upon a howdy dooda, old McDonald had a farm, emphasis on the HAD, all those click-cluckin’ oink moo bastards are wrapped tight between two bun patties, Burger Punk for a nickel you can super size it! 89 cents for a lighter to throw some California tree in my happy meal and if you spin the flint hard enough you can watch little Peter cottontail hoppin’ down the bunny trail, pickin’ up the prairie dogs and pfft, boppin’ ’em on the head, but what I probably love most about Idaho is the salad with the little baby carrots, throw on some bacon bits and BOOM you gotch yourself a party, and you ask yourself if it’s a good idea to invite that one guy from work that always wears the pocket protectors that nobody really likes and you know it isn’t, but you do it anyways because you’re a moron! E-I-E-I-O.
This piece has been published in Teen Ink's monthly print magazine.This piece has also been published in Teen Ink's monthly print magazine.

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This article has 8 comments. Post your own!

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Courtney B. said...
Sep. 11 at 5:01 pm:

Hello. I am from South Carolina also and I found this as a very unique way to express ur feelings about something. Good job

 
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Katherine H. said...
Sep. 4 at 6:40 pm:

made me laugh casue it's so true. lol

 
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Amber1994 said...
Aug. 21 at 9:02 pm:

I have to say great job! it was unique i think i could actually hear this on the radio one day.
I have to add that there was a burger pop-up on the bottom of the page when i read it.
-check out my work and comment!!-

 
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Melinda L. said...
Jul. 17 at 4:22 pm:

Wow. I loved that. It was random and...wow. great job.

 
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Like*Whoa!!! said...
Jul. 13 at 1:54 am:

ohh my gosh:) that took me like twenty times to try and understand it and in the end i still didnt:) i wrote a poem like this once and it just turned out stupid, but you did an amazing job at making your randomness work for you:) post more! we need more crazyy poems in this world! ohh and check out some of my stuff:)

 
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SaraB. said...
Jul. 8 at 2:45 pm:

I love the rambling "this doesn't make any sense" type verse. It's so erratic, but better than I could have done with such raw randomness

 
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mj357 said...
Jul. 4 at 11:56 pm:

i love it! great ending

 
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HayWire said...
Jun. 29 at 1:52 am:

whoa.. ummm... whoa?!?!
ok.. WOW! i loved that.... i just read that three times.. the first time i was like..what?

second time i couldnt catch it all, and the third time i was like, wow what else does this person write..

sadly, you having nothign else. please post more..that was unique and great, and such a random topic for a poem...

whoa...

 
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