Heaven or Hell

The diference is unspoken,
One better than the other.
My lies cover my truth,
Trying hard not to harm another.

I run from my pain,
Covering the trail I leave behind.
I hide from the ones that love me,
So they don't find out i've lied.

Having not found trust,
I am unable to be trusted.
Telling the truth may be hard,
But I really must.

The uncertainess is harming,
But you do what you have to.
Knowing you may hate me,
Is what I should recieve
for lieing to you.

Should I say I'm sorry,
Or tell you another lie.
If you tell me to leave you alone,
should I break down and cry.

If I should die this very day,
Where would I go Heaven or Hell.
I may have fixed my wrongs,
but i'm still not in the right mind to tell.