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Pills Are My Paintbrush

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By Jaquie, West Palm Beach, FL
More by this author
Photo credit: Becky G., Westerville, OH
Pills are my paintbrush
The high is my art
Painting red pictures
Of my broken heart

Pain is my canvas
And life is my muse
Oh how they inspire
Oh how they confuse

The outcasts my clay
The in-crowd my mold
They make a fine sculpture
Bow down and behold

This image I’ve made
Of drug and addiction
Cannot evade
My Lords conviction

I can’t take enough
To hide from his gaze
How high is heaven?
How high will I raise?

Not high enough
And never will be
For the guy up above
Still looks down upon me

When he sees my art
What will his thought be?
What else can he do,
But to condemn me?

And how one so high
Could become yet so low
Is a mystery to me
But my art will show


A picture alone
And a portrait of me
But don’t think your wrong
When my face you can’t see


For while running away
From true art and true love
My planned failed outright
I did not look above

For even though when
I enhanced my highs
I forgot to look up
And ran into the skies

I got hit pretty well
And as you can see
That bump on the head
Knocked some sense into me

My heart was too full
Of these drugs and these lies
And for my Lord
You can’t compromise

And I chose my art
Or what I thought it to be
And the art that I cherished
In turn consumed me

And here’s my happy ending
No more high, I have new art
No more drugs and only love
Plus the Good Lord has my heart

Join the Discussion


This article has 118 comments. Post your own!

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chrisbriones said...
Nov. 20 at 9:24 pm:

its natural for people to, after, or while reading, wonder just what the author has been through. what that person has experienced. what that person has felt that has left such a permanent and distinguishable scar. so i ask you, why does the Good Lord presently hold your heart? what happened that has inspired or compelled you to do what you are today?
oh, and i shouldnt forget to tell you that this is indeed a lovely, and passionate piece of art.

 
Jaquie replied...
yesterday at 12:09 pm :

I've never been exposed to drugs in my life but I have felt the reverberations of such abuse very strongly. My little sister was adopted from a home dealing with substance abuse and through the 4-year adoption process I grew very sympathetic towards the topic. I didn't realize until after this was written that it was infact a happier ending I had hoped for in the situation. Thank you so much for your comments and your willingness to listen to my ramblings.
God bless,
...,

 
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LonelyLove001 said...
Nov. 20 at 1:47 pm:

This is absolutley amazing and it brought me to tears i take this into consideration because i also am in that position now but havent gotten to the clearing yet

 
Jaquie replied...
yesterday at 12:11 pm :

Thank you so much for reading this. You don't know how happy it makes me to see that its being put to good use. I'll be praying for you in this tough time.
God bless,
...,

 
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<3::wish4wings::<3 said...
Nov. 20 at 9:52 am:

omg you're amazing! ilove this so much. it says alot:) thanks for writing it, and keep it up!

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 20 at 11:10 am :

Thank you, so much!

 
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emjay1216 said...
Nov. 19 at 3:02 pm:

i love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is awsum. nice job.

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 19 at 3:28 pm :

Thanks so much.

 
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JoCoGirl said...
Nov. 19 at 12:08 pm:

I officially LOVE this poem! OMG! You have an amazing talent. I also have not had a personal experience with drugs because I have been sheltered but I have experienced it in my family. My brother, in fact. I've seen what drugs will do to someone. Thankfully he is not on them now, but when he was he never ate and he began to look terribly sick. It broke my heart to see him that way and to know how many people are enslaved by drugs. I have a great distane for them and a great love for God. I ... (more »)

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 19 at 12:13 pm :

Thank you so much! And God bless you and your family also!

 
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OscarDonovan said...
Nov. 19 at 10:24 am:

Very well written and I like the flow of it!
However, the fact that you believed that it would somehow "bring a better insight into my situation" is testament to your arrogance.
I have replied to your comment on my own piece and hope you will be able to answer some of my questions.

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 19 at 12:04 pm :

I'm sorry you feel this way. And as to your reply on my comment on your piece -I don't see one.

 
OscarDonovan replied...
Nov. 19 at 12:08 pm :

I've posted it but is quite lengthy, so perhaps they are taking a long time to look over it before they post it.

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 19 at 12:14 pm :

Yes, perhaps that is the answer.

 
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chu-chi,!!! said...
Nov. 17 at 11:02 am:

This was an amazing piece and I love how you made it a metaphor. Keep up the good work and please read some of mine.
Nice Job!

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 18 at 3:54 pm :

Thank you! I'll be sure to take a look.

 
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thepreechyteenager said...
Oct. 20 at 5:52 pm:

cool, i really like what you said

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 14 at 1:39 pm :

Thank you!

 
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bluemagnet22 said...
Oct. 20 at 9:32 am:

Wow,this is an AMAZING poem so well written and wow what a great flow! Oh n thanx for commenting on my poem;)

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 14 at 1:44 pm :

Thank you, too!

 
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Jordon. said...
Oct. 17 at 5:12 am:

this is amazing.
like, seriously.
well done.
keep it up (:

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 14 at 1:41 pm :

Thank you!

 
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savinGrace said...
Oct. 13 at 10:32 pm:

Blinking away tears and wishing you had more poems for me to read. This one was amazing, and can only wonder and hope that you have more writing like this. What a gift!

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:12 am :

Thank you! And as for others... Well, I'm working on it. Hope to have them up soon.
God bless,
...,

 
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Neasha504 said...
Sep. 24 at 1:39 pm:

That was really good!!!

 
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keyboard_musican said...
Sep. 18 at 2:32 pm:

this was deep i like it it gave me chills

 
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Kimberly S. said...
Sep. 12 at 12:19 pm:

Wow. This is.... mindblowingly amazing. Just one question.... Was this based on personal experiences?

 
Jaquie replied...
Sep. 13 at 1:33 pm :

No, this was not based on any personal experience. I'm very sheltered and have no relations with drugs. But I did base this off of times when I have trouble with other addictions. (Ex: to much television, food, guys, drama) Thank you for commenting on my poem!
God bless,
...,

 
Lucky7337 replied...
Sep. 19 at 1:49 pm :

Haha... I am sheltered, also, and also have no relations with substance abuse. THe way this was written, however, (I didn't mean to imply you were an addict or anything), the form and depth of this poem sounds of someone that has dealt with this. You're welcome, and continue the great works!
God Bless!

 
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Nina L. said...
Sep. 10 at 7:43 pm:

Thanks for the comments on my poem =) yours is incredible! so compelling and emotional, and in the end the best ending!!! beautiful!

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 14 at 1:44 pm :

Thank you!

 
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cz123094 said...
Sep. 8 at 6:39 pm:

Wow, after reading that, I am speechless! That poem is so amazing! I really like how all of the stanzas flow together and how you combine the good (God) and the bad (the pills) to get a positive (realization that the pills are a negative form of art) This si so amazing! I'm glad my teacher told me about this site today, your poem is the first one here I read and I am going to read mor!

 
Jaquie replied...
Sep. 8 at 8:26 pm :

I can tell by the way you commented that you have a way of words. I'd love to see some of yours posted.
God bless,
...,

 
cz123094 replied...
Sep. 9 at 5:17 am :

Thanks, I will post some of my writing soon!

 
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Phoenix B. said...
Sep. 8 at 6:17 pm:

I liked that a lot. I can relate So much to it. Thank you. Look at my storry "Issues" By: Phoenix B. :)

 
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Caty Beth F. said...
Sep. 5 at 11:54 pm:

I love your work. It's soooo amazing. you did a wonderful job :)

 
Jaquie replied...
Sep. 6 at 2:00 pm :

Thank you.

 
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Syahirah said...
Sep. 5 at 8:08 am:

Thank you for your comments on my paintings. Your peom is so beautiful. I love the way you put the bads into the good one. The way you blend it together was... Forgive me, I do not know what word I want to put. The conclusion is your poem is a masterpiece. I do hope this writing will choosen to publish in the magazine.

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:13 am :

Thanks for your support!

 
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Jennax3 said...
Aug. 23 at 5:04 pm:

This is flawless... I don't know what to say. If this isn't published, I'll be shocked. You have a perfect rhythmic meter going on here! Rate

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:13 am :

Thank you!

 
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SKMNP said...
Aug. 14 at 1:10 am:

hey! thanks for all the awesome comments on my work, it was good to see if anyone else could connect to the pieces! But this is amazing! The whole thing being a metaphor just makes me really happy to begin with because metaphors are what i think makes a poem. the line "pain is my canvas" and "the art that I cherished In turn consumed me" really get to me, i love it. keep writing!

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:14 am :

Thank you!

 
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Zero_Kiryu said...
Aug. 8 at 11:30 pm:

Sad and yet hopeful. This absolutely beautiful and I love the metaphors. This is real. ZERO

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:15 am :

Thank you so much!

 
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Kevin R. said...
Aug. 5 at 4:41 pm:

I'm almost speechless after reading this. It flowed so seamlessly my mouth was agape by the third stanza. Master class writing, one of the best poems I've read in a while. The end gave me chills!

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:16 am :

Thank you, I can't tell you how much it means to me that you enjoy my work...
God bless,
...,

 
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musicgirl757 said...
Jul. 27 at 1:42 am:

This is amazing!! How the heck is this not in the magizine?

 
Jaquie replied...
Nov. 16 at 6:16 am :

Thank you!

 
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Jaquie said...
Jul. 26 at 7:16 pm:

My piece is about addiction, in this case, to drugs (Pills are my paintbrush). The character finds itself obesessed with all the wrong things; '...Pain is my canvas life is my muse...'. But when they go through a 'bad trip', 'I forgot to look up and ran into the skies',they realize what wrong with their life. 'I got hit pretty well and as you can see, that bump on the head knocked some sense into me'. I hope you understand now, I'm not quite sure whether or not I expl... (more »)

 
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