My Mask

I cant figure it out
I have no doubt
Who I am
no wait I do
I have so many mask which one should I choose
One for many occasions
One for my friends
so I look cool to them
One for my family
so they dont know the real me
the me that goes behind them
and so they dont judge me
but somehow that mask doesnt work
cause sometimes they see right through me or find out things
Then one for me
so I can pretend to be strong
to be someone I'm not
to put on a smile while I know I should not
To let people take advantage
knowing I'm stronger than what I know
How I secretly hate the boy I used to like That I loved that used my love like a drug.
How I see his face from time to time and have to act like he isnt in the dark seeps in my mind
When will I ever be me?