Not me

When you look in the mirror
Who do you see?
I do not recognize the face
That is staring back at me
I do not see someone
Who is strong
I do not see someone
Who feels like they belong
Where is that person
Who smiled just because?
Where is that person
That I once was?
All is see is someone who is weak
I see someone who is scared
Someone whose dreams, whose feelings
Will never be shared
I see fragments of
What I used to be
Fragments,
But not a whole me
Why all the pain,
Anger,
I hold it all inside
Behind thies big wall
I just want to hide
I let other people
Change who I am,
Who I¹m supposd to be
Now they are gone
And I¹m left with this person,
This person who is not me
I let people hurt me,
I let them win
Then feel guilty
For it is I who has sinned
So who is this person
Struggling to get out
This person who needs to hide
Behind the fear, behind the doubt
And when I¹m alone
And it¹s just her and I
Why must I protect her from the truth?
Why must I lie?
If only change were easy
If only life was fair
If only I had someone to hold me
Someone that would care
I need to find the strength
To face all my fears
It needs to be okay
To cry all these tears
Someday I hope to be
That person I¹m meant to be
Someday I hope I get to know
That person who is me