Winter | Teen Ink

Winter MAG

March 17, 2008
By Anonymous

Walking after school
I am struck by the shape of this branch against the bleak sky
shockingly stark and
gray and unrepentant;
Stabbing upwards
so violently – as some knife into a pillow
a sudden rip, and feathers rain down like cloud.
The moment stretches, taut –
(unexpected eternity on a sunless afternoon)
– snapped
as I smile and remember how to breathe



Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 45 comments.


on Oct. 24 2010 at 9:53 pm
TheRaven BRONZE, Miami, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you, fails, and then asks you not to kill him." - Winston Churchill

Outstanding imagery.

miss.snw said...
on Sep. 9 2010 at 9:06 pm
miss.snw, San Antonio, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 10 comments
Very Nice Job. Love it

countrygirl said...
on Aug. 30 2010 at 8:56 pm
it is amzing how you can take something as simple as that and make it into such beautiful imagry

aml1000 said...
on Jun. 28 2010 at 9:56 am
This poem is fab, so descriptive and the idea is incredible

kms777 GOLD said...
on Jun. 8 2010 at 5:19 pm
kms777 GOLD, Winn, Michigan
16 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"learn from your mistakes but regret not a thing"

wow to be able to put that kinda moment into words is incredible. it reminds me of all the times ive stared off and suddenly snapped back. i hope you'll read some of mine and tell me what to wrok on so i can write more like you.

summer-baby said...
on Mar. 8 2010 at 11:47 am
summer-baby, Parkesburg, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments
this is so adorable!! What were youthinking when you wrote this?

on Feb. 16 2010 at 2:53 pm
Ellie.M. PLATINUM, Santa Paula, California
47 articles 1 photo 133 comments
i love this.!!! Check out some of my work i hope u like it.! :) Please comment on my poems i would love to have any tips of any sort.. Check out my newest and latest ones :)

on Feb. 15 2010 at 9:42 am
PoetLaureate07 PLATINUM, Aberdeen, Mississippi
32 articles 0 photos 246 comments

Favorite Quote:
To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing..

I dont get it.... help

creziimimi said...
on Feb. 8 2010 at 1:00 pm
Yeah, I see what your saying, I kinda agree, but I do believe it's a very good poem, I mean I like it, but I see what your saying, and I respect it, becasue I kinda agree. No offence to the author, but yeah, I like it, but Redemtion, your right.

on Jan. 19 2010 at 9:03 pm
forget_me_not SILVER, Chesapeake, Virginia
8 articles 0 photos 30 comments
beautiful...

sungirl109 said...
on Dec. 15 2009 at 5:36 pm
well its okay

Lanae BRONZE said...
on Nov. 15 2009 at 12:07 pm
Lanae BRONZE, Milford, Indiana
2 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' Declares the LORD, 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

great job!!! =)

on Nov. 12 2009 at 6:34 pm
Poet_in_Motion PLATINUM, Sharon, Massachusetts
24 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Love one another." –George Harrison (his last words)

"and down they forgot as up they grew" –e.e. cummings

"The sea is just a wetter version of the sky..." –Regina Spektor

I totally disagree with Redemption because this is a really, really fabulous poem and the imagery is great. And anyways, it's free-verse, so the lines can be of any length (that's why I love free-verse the best; so much freedom!). I think the flow is great and it paints a perfect picture in my mind.

bamboom212 said...
on Nov. 1 2009 at 9:06 pm
i also disagree with Redemption. The poem does flow and it's really good. One of the best I've read in a long while.

on Jun. 3 2009 at 10:06 pm
tigeress3 PLATINUM, Dayton, Ohio
35 articles 0 photos 78 comments
Very inspired, loved the pillow metaphor!

on Mar. 31 2009 at 10:01 pm
Wow, this is, I don't know what to say or what to rank it so i put okay because it stuned me at the way it effects the reader. I mean wow, great job. I would like to see more of your work. It is really nice.

on Mar. 17 2009 at 11:44 pm
I liked it but i dont quit understand it if i did i think it would be a really good poam

on Mar. 6 2009 at 3:12 pm
Undiscovered PLATINUM, Trophy Club, Texas
20 articles 0 photos 29 comments
Your imagery is absolutely stunning! The knife in the pillow painted a perfect picture in my mind! Keep it up!

on Feb. 17 2009 at 1:23 am
yael krifcher BRONZE, Potomac, Maryland
3 articles 0 photos 32 comments
okay

on Feb. 15 2009 at 1:56 am
I disagree with Redemption65 this peice does flow. It all depends on how you read it. Very nice job!