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Daddy's Womb This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.





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This article has 1741 comments. Post your own!

Bubblybubbles223 said...
Feb. 10, 2011 at 1:16 pm:
this is kinda dumb, not trying to be mean but there are other pieces wayyyy better and this shouldnt be #1. Thank you.
 
Aspiringauhor replied...
Feb. 14, 2011 at 4:40 pm :
If you re-read my comment, I never said you couldn't have that opinion. I just said that you weren't very polite in the way you shared your opinion. At least the other people who didn't like it were polite about it.
 
Bubblybubbles223 replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 9:11 am :
why do you keep defending this poem????????? seriously everyone who said something bad about it, you have commented back to them defending it. don't you have anything else to do. it's not even yur poem.
 
1EmoKidd1 replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 2:46 pm :
This Is A GREAT Poem, What It Means To Me, is Probably Diffrent That Other People, But It Sends A Stron Message. So Stop Hating. Haters Make Us Famous =D
 
Aspiringauhor replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 6:31 pm :
I agree, 1EmoKidd1. And Bubblybubbles223, I can defend whoever I would like to defend. I believe this poem is worthy of defense. Yes, I actually have a life, unlike many others on this website. This is something I do in my spare time... And I am allowed to. So stop telling me otherwise.
 
Bubblybubbles223 replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 8:21 pm :
fine, and Im still allowed to hate on this too
 
1EmoKidd1 replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 8:55 pm :
KK Bubblybubbles223, do what u want all ur doing is making us famous ;D
 
Bubblybubbles223 replied...
Feb. 16, 2011 at 12:50 pm :
It doesnt make you famous, it makes you rude to break down someones opinion. I have my opinion and you have yours. Theres no point in this poem. What the heck is it even about? Being chained by your father? Thats plain creepy!!!!!!!!!! And btw all the comments other than the original, were not me. someone stole my password. and my opinion holds true because i belive this person shouldnt be so worshipped when all they did was write a creepy poem and some other poems have meaning, depth, and reaso... (more »)
 
Aspiringauhor replied...
Feb. 16, 2011 at 3:17 pm :
That's exactly what I was thinking when you were typing mean things about my opinion. I never said that you weren't allowed to "hate on this," but if you think about it, it's not the nicest thing to do. Also, I don't think it makes me or 1EmoKidd1 famous. And guess what? I am entitled to my opinion as well, and it shouldn't be jeopardized or changed either. It goes both ways. And by the way, I don't believe that someone stole your password. Since you have the same opinions as the person who stol... (more »)
 
Bubblybubbles223 replied...
Feb. 17, 2011 at 1:17 pm :
well just letting you know. I never said our views are different and i never said you couldnt have your opinion so stop making me seem like the antagonist when all i did was share my opinion. Not all feedback IS polite, thats the entire point. So do not try to change my opinion because i never did the sort to you. So stop its just an opinion.
 
Aspiringauhor replied...
Feb. 17, 2011 at 7:12 pm :
My point exactly. And I am going to discontinue this conversation after this comment, as it is going absolutely nowhere. One last thing: I wish you'd stop saying I'm trying to change your opinion! I am not doing that. I'm sharing mine. There is no opinion involved in this conversation anymore. This is just two people trying to make the other person look bad. So I apologize if that's how you perceived my words as. Goodbye, then.
 
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WillowFalls This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 10, 2011 at 8:15 am:
This is AMAZING!!!! I love it and I understand what you mean!
 
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Brooke B. said...
Feb. 9, 2011 at 6:45 pm:
Wow, thats... great! It took me a second read to get what I can only interpret as what I think it could mean. Its amazing just, creative. Way to go :)
 
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RedRosePoet said...
Feb. 8, 2011 at 4:37 pm:
very deep (: will you read mine called We were just Friends? (: 
 
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Nooneimportant2u said...
Feb. 8, 2011 at 6:51 am:
I think this poem is really wonderful , your very indepth and that is a unique quality in peaple today.
 
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ski_mayday said...
Feb. 7, 2011 at 7:35 am:
This is a beautiful poem, but I don't understand the meaning. Could someone please explain?
 
1EmoKidd1 replied...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 9:03 pm :
ith every poem every reader gets a diffrent meaning.
 
ski_mayday replied...
Feb. 20, 2011 at 7:10 pm :
I guess I would like to know what the other was thinking when they wrote it because I can't figure it out.
 
Aspiringauhor replied...
Mar. 22, 2011 at 3:31 pm :
They meant that their father was holding them down from flying... a.k.a. holding them back from achieving their dreams. :)
 
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DancingDimples95 said...
Feb. 6, 2011 at 4:27 pm:

really wonderful! this poem is very impressive! strong work! keep writing!

DD95

 
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AVERAGE said...
Feb. 3, 2011 at 7:31 pm:
I FIND THIS PIECE COMPLETLY AMAZING! I'VE READ IT LIKE 10 TIMES. . . . I REALLY LIKE THE WAY ITS WRITTEN AND YOUR CONCEPT. ITS MAGNIFICENT
 
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