If only you knew

If my words were strong then this could work.
I know I’m a coward for not saying this to you.
This, for me, works better written than said:
I’m sorry for the sorrow I caused.

I know things I did hurt you.
I know things I said hurt you.
I know my actions hurt you.
I know my friendship hurt you.

I know all this but one thing I don’t understand is,
Why did you love me?
Was it because I wasn’t like the others?
Was it because I looked fragile?

There were things that you knew of me.
Why did you still love me then?
You knew I wanted to forget the one I had loved before you.
But there were some things you didn’t know.

I fell in love with you.
I cared about you.
I protected you too.
Why could you not see this?

I wish things could be erased.
Like my past.
Like my bad friends.
Like my torments.

But most of all I want the pain to be erased.
If I could I would erase myself from your memories.
If I could I would erase the pain I caused you.
If I could I would change everything between us.