I hate myself for having loved you

I lived in your eyes and the edges of your lips,
slept at your side
chasing dreams

I breathed on your breaths,
it rained and I too did when you were
sad

at night, sleep stretched itself upon my eyelids
like a spider's web,
while you mouthed sentences
that had a softer touch than a lover's hand

I was gone -
you kidnapped me to places I'd never
visited before;
we travelled on untamed laughter
and love spraying from the pools of our
hearts

we made breathless love
almost fully clothed on the grass
and the wooden floor in your flat.

you held me tight,
showed me off as if I was a medal
or a golden trophy you've won;
we loved each other, you loved me and

I loved you once.

I wasn't tamed,
(my veins were running wild)
I dreamed of something more
that stretched beyond the borders of
the world you had to offer

I hate myself for having loved you
because now all I've left you with

is the sour taste of my love