Knives of Winter

, Versailles, KY

You aren’t the same as you used to be.
Something has changed:
This feels like war.

What used to be easy is hard:
Do I even know you at all?

Your words cut deep,
like the knives of a killer.
I scream out, but I’m not heard.

Time has turned our world into a never-ending winter:
The cold freezes our hearts,
And color abandons our landscape.

You aren’t the same as you used to be.
Something has changed:
This is war.

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StarlitSunrise said...
Feb. 17 at 11:53 am:

I have to disagree with thatunknownnothing. I actually liked your flow here, especially in the last stanza. You did create a few pauses with your words, but this seemed intentional to me. The strain that you are trying to convey can be felt in your writing style. In my opinion, the best part is the very last line. I love the contrast of a declaration against the uncertainty of the rest of the poem. Keep writing!

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thatunknownthing said...
Feb. 17 at 11:15 am:

I understand you, and some descriptions are interesting, i liked the 4th stanza especially. But this doesn't flow as well as 'poetry' should, and you could have put it down better. 3/5! :)

Maggie99 replied...
Feb. 17 at 11:33 am :

Thanks for the feedback, and I understand what you mean. I just started writing poetry so I'm starting to get the hang of it. I'm so used to writing regular fiction that I forget that I don't need to explain everything within a poem. I need to work on just letting it flow....so again, thank you.