Chaos Theory | Teen Ink

Chaos Theory MAG

November 14, 2008
By Anonymous

Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
So
I tell her I believe in people.

Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.

In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy but
I know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.

In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs …
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.

Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings …

Carolyn said she believed in angels.



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This article has 376 comments.


on May. 21 2012 at 6:16 pm
michaela mrianda BRONZE, Temporary, Other
4 articles 0 photos 33 comments
congrats on winning the poetry contest. the poem is amazing i read it almost every other day i even have a printout that i carry. your a great writer. i hope some day i can write with as much emotion and feeling as you 

latrel said...
on May. 21 2012 at 12:57 pm
I love the puns they give it humor.this pome reminds me of an epic poem.

on May. 17 2012 at 4:18 pm
mindless_dreaming BRONZE, Wyckoff, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
"May make my heart as a millstone, set my face as a flint, Cheat and be cheated, and die: who knows? We are ashes and we are dust." -Alfred, Lord Tennyson, 'Maud'

wow... this is amazing. completely breathless right now, i love this poem so much. so well written and such great imagery created, i'm literally at a loss of words. completely perfect poem. completely. <3

Aoide said...
on Apr. 29 2012 at 6:22 pm
This is one of the most beautiful poems I've ever read. I wish I could say more, but words just don't do something this perfect justice.

on Apr. 29 2012 at 6:15 pm
HappySappy SILVER, Berlin Heights, Ohio
6 articles 0 photos 34 comments

Favorite Quote:
Courage is the magic that turns dreams into reality.

An eye for an eye makes the whole world go blind.

Amazing descriptions. You have written a poem that is perfect.

on Apr. 27 2012 at 12:30 pm
EllieWatts11 BRONZE, Grandville, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 2 comments
this is so good

Lexie96 GOLD said...
on Apr. 21 2012 at 12:24 pm
Lexie96 GOLD, Havana, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 378 comments

Favorite Quote:
Now Cinderella don't you go to sleep, it's such a bitter form of refuge, oh don't you know the kingdom's under siege, and everbody needs you. - The Killers

I've posted before, but going back and rereading this I am just struck again by how taken I've become by these words. This is such a beautiful, yet tragic poem, if it is based from life I am very sorry, I know quite a few people who could benefit from reading this and I will be recommending it to all of them. Congradulations on winning the award in your category and on publication... you deserve it and much more! Keep writing, please.

Also, if anyone has the time to check out my short story, Evangeline, I would be very grateful and would also be happy to provide comment on their work. Please and thank you!


on Apr. 19 2012 at 1:44 pm
WhatsYourStory SILVER, St. Louis, Missouri
8 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Believe it or not, you are in control of your own life. you are the reason why you're sad. And you are the reason why you're happy. So don't wait for happiness. Go out and find it. Right now. And don't let anyone else tell you otherwise."

amazing..<3

jellybean said...
on Apr. 17 2012 at 4:40 pm
wait is it true

KatsK DIAMOND said...
on Apr. 7 2012 at 7:45 pm
KatsK DIAMOND, Saint Paul, Minnesota
57 articles 0 photos 301 comments

Favorite Quote:
Being inexhaustible, life and nature are a constant stimulus for a creative mind.
~Hans Hofmann
You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
~Ray Bradbury

Wait, is it true? Great either way. And how it describes how she changes her beliefs and appearances, and then the end-- seriously, that's great! The more i look at it . . . I'm seriously getting chills, and you have rendered me incoherent.

Brookealee said...
on Mar. 26 2012 at 10:48 pm
Brookealee, Gilbert, Arizona
0 articles 0 photos 8 comments
Such a thought-provoking perspective. A beautiful piece.

on Mar. 24 2012 at 4:28 pm
Zoe-22-Turner DIAMOND, Beverly, Massachusetts
99 articles 33 photos 91 comments
carolyn says and then carolyn said at the end, im so sorry. you are an amazing writer, i was reduced to tears, so powerful, crazy amazing writing. it was beautifuly written and tragic

kyrireese GOLD said...
on Mar. 20 2012 at 9:03 am
kyrireese GOLD, Dallas, Texas
17 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything will absolutely be all right."
"Hold fast to dreams." - Langston Hughes

Brilliant.

on Mar. 16 2012 at 7:31 pm
BT1718 PLATINUM, Worthington, Ohio
24 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
dream as if youll live forever live as if youll die today

amazing wow that was realy good

dreamshaker said...
on Mar. 16 2012 at 3:23 pm
dreamshaker, Clarkston, Michigan
0 articles 0 photos 64 comments
This is perfection.
That's all I can say.

emmpps16 said...
on Mar. 16 2012 at 10:40 am
emmpps16, Hardwick, New Jersey
0 articles 9 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'm the one that has to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life, the way I want to. -Jimi Hendrix

That was... beautiful...  but at the same time mind-blowing in a way.

on Feb. 6 2012 at 3:13 am
michaela mrianda BRONZE, Temporary, Other
4 articles 0 photos 33 comments
"raindance72 said... Dec. 2, 2011 at 9:02 pm: I've already commented but I read this through again and I'm just blown away by it. So beautiful, powerful, haunting....there isn't a rating high enough for this poem." you said the words right out of my mouth this is amazing i hope to hear one of your pomes again soon...wow

Psychosys said...
on Feb. 1 2012 at 9:47 pm
I interpreted the angels as a reference to heaven/the afterlife with the poem ending in a suicide. nonetheless a Powerful and Striking poem written by a brilliant wordsmith.

on Feb. 1 2012 at 4:05 pm
TheRoadNotTaken BRONZE, Sanford, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Two roads diverge in a yellow wood. And i - I take the one less travled by. And that has made all the diffrence." - Robert Frost " The road not taken"

There are many ways for a person to construct a poem or writting ... i belive that yes, you are one of the many people who can. But you are much diffrent. you can take a common moment that happens in many peoples lives and you turned that moment into a thrilling, heart-renching, beautiful words that stream like a river into the common internet. Now that is something!

on Feb. 1 2012 at 3:48 pm
Doves_and_Ravens SILVER, Orlando, Florida
5 articles 1 photo 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It is not in the stars that hold our destiny, but in ourselves."

-William Shakespeare

Perfect. Need I say more?