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First Haiku This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

Gray coming from gray
Pigeon abandons cobblestone
In sudden flutter

A scarf tilts in the breeze
White with roses
A woman sits, waiting

The jingle of money
A child plays violin alone
Pennies in his hat

How sad –
Gold relics sit in the sun
Only tourists want them

A bird cries
Beside a blue bicycle
It will not be still

Summer is here
The rich have emerged from their caves
They dine like animals

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.





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This article has 13 comments. Post your own!

LinkinPark12This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 28 at 10:17 am:
This is really good :) Beautifully written... but it's not a haiku.
 
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Dreamgirl95 said...
Nov. 11, 2011 at 4:35 pm:
is this really your first haiku, cause this is amazing
 
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Johnnyrain said...
Jul. 12, 2011 at 5:54 pm:
Damn thats good!!
 
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DifferentTeenThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 16, 2010 at 5:02 pm:

A little hard to understand, it took me a couple of times to understand some things. But it would make an even better free verse.

Also I find it a little ironic how the title is First Haiku and itys not really a Haiku haha.

 
Blairezie replied...
Jan. 16, 2012 at 4:27 pm :
I was thinking the same thing! It's not really a haiku, but it would be a good free verse.
 
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Grasshopper007 said...
Apr. 25, 2010 at 11:06 am:
I totally agree with you people. A haiku isn't supposted to be designed like this, plus I don't think it's very well thought out
 
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Skeezics said...
Jan. 24, 2010 at 5:37 pm:
Really pretty but they are not haiku's. A haiku has 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second and 5 in the third.
 
sammyso3 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 11, 2010 at 4:17 pm :
I agree, it's great imagery but they are not haikus. Perhaps you counted the syllables incorrectly?
 
Girl-Writer replied...
Mar. 27, 2010 at 10:43 pm :
Ditto. But it's still a great poem - and like others on this page I believe this poem has great imagery. Hope I'll be able to create something as good as this piece.
 
Skeezics replied...
Mar. 28, 2010 at 10:34 am :
It really isn't that hard to write things like this. All you need is a little inspiration, a pencil and paper and you can create whatever your heart desires.
 
TheImaginaryCow This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Apr. 25, 2010 at 11:42 am :
hi, yeah I know that they're not really haikus. I wrote them with a group of people while I was attending UVA's young writers workshop. Basically, every "haiku" was supposed to be a little snippet of something we observed at the downtown shopping center in Charlottesville. I know what haikus are (5 syllables, 7 syllables, 5 syllables), but our instructor told us that we could take liberties with that, and since I'd never really written haikus before, take liberties I did. :p
 
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Rachel S. said...
Jan. 19, 2010 at 8:12 am:
This is really beautiful!
 
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Mikey said...
Sept. 7, 2009 at 12:35 pm:
Very well written! I love the imagery, especially in the first and last stanzas.
 
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