Emptiness, a pain
Inside my heart waiting here
For pain to disperse
Inside my heart waiting here
For pain to disperse
I like the oxymoron that you have going on here. Rather than describing emptiness as a lack of something inside the heart, you describe it as a manifestation of pain. The idea that emptiness is actually the presence of something unwanted paints an amazing image. It really breaks down the idea of what pain really does. It not only causes hurt, but its presence can drive away everything else. Great job, especially for a Haiku!
SaphiraBrightscalesLike the repetition of the word "pain"... :D
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