A wise toad sage once said to a young blonde with a demon fox living in him, “A place where people can remember you, is a place where you can call home.” That toad sage is Jiraiya the Gallant from a fictional story named Naruto. I’m Kallen Vue, a quiet but resilient high school student. In a big small world, where everything is so huge and big, I feel like an ant. Everyone else feels like a beetle, or a tiger, or a stone pillar. But for me, this world is too big and too scary for a small ant like me. Everything is so complex and unknown to me, in the grand scheme of things, I think I know everything but I’ve only learned a small percentage of it. I am not just your regular ant, I am a different kind of ant. I am an ant of Hmong, meaning I’m out of place in the world. This ant is also quite artistic and creative. Ants are always moving, they travel places and that’s something I want to expand more on.

Nobody really recognized or knew us up until recently as the 2010’s. We lived in a small community and a small place where nobody knew who we were. Us Hmong people originated in China as a small ethnic group, then we moved towards Laos and Thailand to expand our people. Some of us were even in Vietnam, but the Vietnam War moved us out into the United States of America as immigrants. I never understood or knew what it was like to be an immigrant, but my mom and dad knew. As a child, I was very connected to my language and culture. But as time slowly moved on, I became more disconnected and unknown to it. Something that felt so foreign to me, which was America, is no longer foreign. As the opposite happened, I felt foreign to my own culture. Of course I still understand my language and culture, but I feel like I don’t belong there, I don’t fit in this place. I feel like a lost ant. I’ve been trying to reconnect though and I think that’s some improvement.

I like to draw, write, and create stuff. I especially like to draw comics, since they’re easy to make and fun to read. It’s hard to write comics nowadays, because back then I would write brainless stories. Like a boy who could turn into a giant hero and protect the world from evil giant lizards. I spend a lot of time putting my passion and thoughts into a story and then turn it into a comic. The perks of being a writer and an artist. I don’t only find art through drawing and writing, I also find it through music. I can play music and it’s just 1 instrument, but it’s better than not knowing anything. I’m not a pro at it, but I know how to play it nonetheless. That instrument is the piano, which is a so-called “hard instrument” but it’s actually really easy. I’m still learning, but everyone is still learning. I’ve been doing artsy stuff since Kindergarten and I wasn’t good at it either. Through my hard work and determination, I got to where I am. And I can go even further beyond this point. Just like an ant, they need to push themselves to find their way. But the way is still long and it isn’t over yet.

For my future, a profession is something I would like to seek in order to survive society. However, that is just a goal and not my true dreams and desires. I have many dreams and desires, but I want to travel across the world and visit many places. Japan, UK, France, Egypt, Brazil, Nigeria, and many other places. I have lived in the US my entire life and I’ve only lived in California. I would also like to visit other states as well, but in the end, they’re all limited to the US. I want to expand my adventures by going to other countries. I want to learn more about the culture, religions, and languages of other countries. In school, I’ve always learnt about white culture. But, I have never learned about black, hispanic, and asian culture. The only culture I could really connect to is my own, but I don’t feel like I know it well enough to say that I know enough. I can speak 3 languages, and I won’t be able to learn them all. I would want to at least understand their language, so I can connect with them better.

Overall, everything is so big while I’m as small as an ant. I wish to be bigger, to grow stronger, to understand and accomplish everything I desire. I am a lost ant who feels disconnected and lost from their family, an ant who has creativity, artistic, and courageous skills but doesn’t know how to use it proficiently, and an ant who wants to go to other places than his home. There is still so much to learn and so much to grow from, no matter how far you think you made it. The path is infinite, you can only keep on going and there’s no going back. That’s what I am, someone who thinks they got it but realizes that there’s still so much more to grow from. Maybe, an ant can learn to become human.