In preschool, I was the proud owner of a pet fish named Flicker.  I loved Flicker with all of my heart.  I talked to Flicker and looked at him as a friend.  One day, I walked into my room, eager to see my fish.  Flicker was not in his tank.  Since I was little and didn’t understand what was going on, I thought that Flicker was playing hide and seek.  I looked at the tank from all angles.  I couldn’t find Flicker, so I became bored of the game.  I went into my dad’s room to ask if he had seen my fish.  My dad turned around in his office chair, a nervous look on his face.  Flicker had died.  I cried and cried, and I had no idea what to do now that my friend was gone.

I had a very similar problem at the end of my freshman year in high school.  My brother graduated that year.  I suppressed tears and sadness, but on the inside I was torn to shreds.  My brother had always been there for me, and he was the most important person in my life.  I didn’t know how to handle him leaving.  The one person that I trusted to help me with any problem I came to him with was going away, and I became lost.

After quite a bit of thought, I realized that Jacob, my brother’s friend and a junior when my brother graduated, was just like my brother in many ways.  We were always hostile towards each other, but we were actually the best of friends.  I never thought about the day that Jacob would graduate too.  Jacob was gone and again, I lost my way.  Now I would only get to see my brother over Christmas break.  This time I did cry, letting out all of the frustration and confusion that I felt.  There was extensive thought, but I could not find a fix for my dilemma.  I became closed-minded.  I pushed my problems into the back of my mind and left them unsolved.

I found out that leaving my problems unsolved only lead to more confusion and frustration, and realized that closing my mind didn’t help me with my problems in any way.  I learned to keep an open mind as I walked into my problems.  My open mind lead to embracing confrontation, and lifted my problems off of my back by solving them.  Whether my pet fish dies or my brother leaves, I know that I cannot rely on somebody to be there to help me all the time.  Sometimes, my problems are my own to solve.