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Chasing a High
My life used to be so different. I often found myself sitting at home thinking about my presence on earth and what my purpose was. Not only was I curious, I was frustrated. Frustrated that my peers were deeply enthralled in their own spiritual lives but here I was left to figure it all out myself. So, I took it as a challenge to learn more about myself and to discover the deeper meaning of life. Being a very independent person, I brought it upon myself to embrace faith although I was brought up so strongly without it. It all started in a car with one of the most influential people in my life whether he knows it or not, my basketball coach Joe. I found myself sitting his car on the way home from a strenuous basketball game in which he would strongly criticize me, but never too much to handle. Suddenly, the thought of asking him about his spiritual life swiftly filled my mind, but I blew it off, thinking to myself it was just one of my many errant thoughts. As we came to the next light a few minutes later the thought arose in my head again, and when the light turned green, I vividly remember passing a baptist church. At that point, I knew that my thought wasn't just a random occurrence so anxiously I asked "How did you start to become a believer of any faith?", his response is one I'll never forget. He went on to tell me how his parents got divorced and he grew up in a Catholic family and how his life was at an all time low when he decided to believe in any faith related teachings. He then asked for my permission to pray for me, although we were sitting in the car together, which, uneasily I said "sure". It was in this moment that I realized I had a special connection with a God. A feeling of the most filling warmth entered my heart and it was something I've never felt before, with my eyes beginning to water I reflected on my life and what I wanted to be and who I was now.
From that point on in my life, I've been chasing that feeling of warmth. I've been helping out in the community, talking to people, giving advice, and most importantly trying to better myself. Although many feelings of a "high" are usually drug related and cause negative impacts on your life, this feeling that I'm chasing is one that has had such a positive impact on my life and brought me to a higher level of character. The longing I feel everyday for that feeling continues to push me to be the best I can be and more importantly be filled with a new spirituality that propels me to become that person I've always wanted to be.
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I hope people will read this and realize that life has such a unique meaning to each individual and more importantly to realize that growth as a person is an amazing feeling.