Chapter Two

i must've fallen asleep, because my mother was shaking me to wake up. "Sami, Sami wake up, it's time for dinner," my mother said. i groaned and rubbed my eyes. i looked my alarm clock. i had been asleep for about two hours. i checked my cell phone for any messages or missed calls, and Marianna had called me 4 times and texted me 16. i sighed, and knew that she was aching for the story, however i didn't exactly feel like telling that the guy i had been crushing on for over a year liked HER instead of me. besides that, i was hungry and i smelled food downstairs.

i headed down the stairs and into the kitchen, and was startled to see Marianna sitting at the kitchen table. Marianna, who is like a sister to me, normally stays over for dinner, but i wasn't exactly prepared for it. "Hello, lazy, decided to come eat?" i tried to smile at her.

"Hey, creeper, any idea what's for dinner?" i had asked Marianna, but my mom answered for her.

"Lasagna, just how you like it. Loaded with cheese." that made me smile. i absolutely love my moms cheese lasagna. maybe something will go right today, hopefully not to backfire in my face. maybe.

Dinner was cool, as i mentioned, i LOVE my moms cheese lasagna. I didn't mention Rob at dinner because i didn't want to get upset, but i could tell Marianna wanted to strangle me for keeping my mouth shut. she just didn't know it ended up so depressing for me. after we put our dishes in the sink, we headed up to my bedroom, and i knew Marianna was expecting details, as usual. she anxiously shut the door behind us. she spun around to us and said, "okay, spill. what happened?" she was so eager but so unaware. as i brought the scene back to my memory, my eyes misted as i tried to hold back the tears. Marianna saw my sadness and her expression instantly changed. although she was still eager, she wasn't excited anymore. "oh, sami, what happened?" i desperately tried to contain the tears. i took a shaky breath and began. "So we finally meet at the rose bush, and he's like 'i know you like me' and i'm like yeah, that's why we're going to the dance, becuase i like you and you like me, but" i let out a sob, "he likes you!" i wailed. Marianna's face instantly went from to concern to shock. her jaw dropped and she kind of froze for a moment and then remembered that i was upset. i flopped down on my bed and she joined me, now in 'best-friend-mode'. she put her arm around me and i put my head on her shoulder. "why does it have to be like this?" i asked her.

"i wish i knew sam. but like you always tell me, things always get worse before they get better." i groaned at the thought of things getting any worse. Marianna realized why her words weren't helping and i could tell she was trying to think of something else to say. i could also tell she REALLY wanted to know more about what happened but she was too much of a friend to ask me. i thanked her mentally for that. i looked around my room at the fuzzy pink rug below my feet on top of a cold hardwood floor. across from me was an old wooden dresser with a huge mirror attached to the back of it that had belonged to my dad before i was born. to the left of the dresser was the door, and to the right of my ancient dresser was my closet. my closet door was cluttered with pictures of mainly marianna and me. there were also several pictures of my cats, Lilly and Baby, and my chinchilla named Jareth. i looked down at my bed spread, which was pink and black and had leapord spots that were black and white. i had gotten it for Christmas from my grandparents on my moms side. i knew that behind me was a window with my pink and black polka dotted curtains. to the right of the window, in the corner of the room, was a table that i had covered with teal fabric. on top of it was my ipod speakers that also served as a radio and alarm clock, my jewelry box, a few pictures, and my collection of body sprays and perfumes. Marianna had finally come up with something. she said, "Well, remember in second grade when we promised we would never let ANY guy get between us?" she waited for my answer, but i said nothing. "Well this isnt any different. If you don't let Rob ruin our friendship, neither will I. i promise." I knew that if Marianna made a promise, she kept it, so i said okay. We sat in silence for a while as my breathing slowly returned to normal.

"You know what you need Sami?" she said, wiping tears from my face with her sleeve, "You and i need to go to the Roller House," she declared. i knew what that meant, and it wasn't just roller skating. Marianna was going to get me a boyfriend, or at least try to. the Roller House was where Marianna almost always went to find a guy. i dont know what it was about Marianna, but it was so easy for boys to love her. i swear if she wanted to, she could get any guy to like her, it's just her thing. a few times, she took me to the Roller House to get me a boyfriend, and she always got the guys attention. however, getting guys attention isnt all it takes to get Samantha Jenkish a boyfriend. they have to pay attention to ME, not just Marianna, which doesnt happen very often. Before i could say anything, she grabbed my hand and was pulling me towards my closet. As expected, she started rambling on about what i was going to wear and about my 'future boyfriend'. she does this everytime she drags me down to the Roller House, goes thru this routine. First, she takes me to the closet and goes thru every peice of clothing i have until she discovers what she considers the "perfect outfit". Once i change, she digs out all out makeup combined and continues to transform my face. sometimes, if she's really in the spirit, she'll pull out my curling iron or my straightening iron and does my hair however she thinks it looks best. she doesnt let me near a mirror until she's finished and then asks for my opinion (as if i could change her mind). at the very least i could give a suggestion to change the earrings or add a bracelet or something hoping she would consider it. when ever Marianna and I went anywhere, whether it be the mall, movies, or obviously the Roller House, she would dress me up like a doll and present me to the world in search of my one true love or some other farie tale crap. before i met Rob i didn't really believe in "true love". Then when i did meet Rob i believed we were meant to be together until i found out he was using me; using me to get to my best friend. As i finally came to this sick conclusion i became very angry. though i usually tuned Marianna out anyway as she ranted on about my hair and future relationship with Prince Charming, now that i was mad, i was entirely prepared to lash out at her if she asked me if i was listening. that jerk, that jerk that i had trusted enough to believe in this thing people call "love". i had honestly believed in him and all he wanted was my best friend. i guessed marianna had noticed i had become angry because she said, "Sami, are you okay?", in a gentle voice. i automatically glared at her, but then i saw the look of concern on her face and my expression softened. i managed to mutter, "Yeah im fine" out without snapping at her. she eyed me suspiciously as if to say, "i dont believe you," but she of all people knows not to bother me when im in one of my 'moods'. i know it kills her to, but Marianna had to suffer in silence as she wouldnt ask for details until i was calm. it took about five minutes for me to push Rob out of my mind. Marianna almost immediately noticed when i was calm, and she was probably waiting for it. "So what was all that about?" she asked me finally.

"I just realized that Rob, the guy i had waited years for, who i had trusted enough to believe love was a real thing, was just using me to get to my best friend," i explained in disgust. for once, marianna didnt know what to say. she was a big believer in farie tale endings and happily ever after, which is why i dont normally express my thoughts on "love". i suppose she wanted me to say something to end the awkward silence, but i kept my mouth shut in fear of shattering her dreams. as much as i disagreed with her, i couldnt hurt her that way. i guess she finally decided she was just going to have to change my mind-- which normally happens when i dont agree with her. i swear, she would make an excellent lawyer. "Well, you'll think differently once i find you the right guy. but for that i need you to cooperate and act like you arent going to bite someones head off." she smiled at me playfully so i knew she was joking, so i tried to smile but it turned more into a grimace. "Oh, sami, come on, you gotta get back out there!" she said.

"I never really WAS out there. i made an exception for ONE guy who broke my heart so i dont see a point in believing in something that isnt there," i replied. i honestly didnt want to hurt her, but i wanted her to know how i felt about "love" at the same time. Sure, love exists for family and really close best friends like Marianna and me, but not between a guy and girl. yeah, you see those couples that seem to be head over heels in love with eachother, but im just not one of those people. 'I thought love was only true in farie tales. Then for someone else but not for me.' i remembered the words to a song i couldnt place the name on. 'Love was out to get me. That's the way it seemed. Disappointment haunted all my dreams.' Marianna insisted on taking me to Roller House to find a boyfriend anyway, just as i predicted. Marianna is one of the most stuborn people i have ever met, but what she doesnt know is i am also extremely stuborn, whether i show it or not. i may go on pretending i see their side of the conversation, but its just an act, and its not worth the fighting-- ESPECIALLY with Marianna. its just really not worth wasting your breath with her, so i shut up. i guess whether i wanted to or not, i was going to 'look for a guy'. Here we go again.