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It's just a dream
My hands cover my face and mouth as I scream into the night, pining for a executioner to distance me from this pain. A knife in one hand, my heart in the other. I choke and wheeze as I gasp for oxygen, but all that’s left in the air is ashes of what was, and what is meant to be. I prayed for a savior but no one would turn their faces, for I was buried in the solitude of my deepest, darkest fears. It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream I told myself repeatedly.
The truth was a dagger, pain and sorrow were captivated by my sinful cries. It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream. I screamed into their souls, but the message did not carry, for their souls were burnt, charred with regret and forgetfulness of their abundant past lives, skies of blue and the warm sunshine beating down on their ivory-rose skin. A fresh glass of lemonade between their infinitesimal periwinkle fingertips. A small dog running along the shore of the local beach, children playing hide and seek and king of the hill on their “gargantuan” sandcastles. teenagers and adults bathe in the light, hoping, praying that their Ivory complexion transforms into a new shade of chestnut, but for the less lucky, would look crimson next to a crisply boiled lobster.
If they only knew that what they were in that life, would have no impact on who they are now, and how quickly death’s darkness can creep through the gentle raindrops and create a rushing waterfall of lost hopes, lost dreams, lost loves, lost lives. Their eyes bloodshot, their hearts stained a shade so dark, so black it blinded my soul. Leaving me lifeless, hopeless, a depressing shell. Filled with fire, embers from their dazzling campfires and radiant lanterns outside their doorstep, shining as a permanent welcome mat.
It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream. Their lives resemble in every way a raging cyclone, an unbreakable force as long as life exists, they will to. Even if they don’t want to. In order to survive, they must destroy, they must kill, and where there is life, there is death.
My life before this was unlike any other. I opened my eyes, my miniscule structure, my fragile hands wrapped around my mother’s perfection. Her strong, substantial stare, with more love than a fountain. My father staring over her shoulder at my crystal blue eyes and snow white hair. As I grew old I knew I was different... the other kids teased me, called me crazy and it hurt like a gunshot, for I knew I was, I believed their taunting. Their giggles and snickers as I hovered in the narrow, icy corner. I could see them, their bleak, bitter, expressionless expressions. Their lifeless lonely corpses drifting along the desolate, reclusive hallways. A stone cold enigma that my eyes were cursed to partake. They were dead.
I could feel the fear in their eyes, creeping, leaning in, trying to rip me from my soul, but I am strong, I was strong. Before I was sent to this wretched place, these uninhabited inhabitants I now call my home. I was once jubilant, joyous. Captivated by the beautiful place in which I was raised, for I knew of the other land. The other life in which would be waiting, anxiously for my arrival, but little did they know I had been living there my entire existence. Little did I know that I had been born Hell-bound.
It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream I hoped and prayed my deathly scream would send me back to my heavenly home , the place I once had called my own. How could a child be born in this place, full of life, full of hate, where I am the bait for the hungry souls that wait for me to lose my hold on this life I wish to live, in this dream I must relive.
It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream I remember like it was yesterday, I was just fifteen sitting In my room listening to my thoughts, my music blasting my eardrums, “The sound of life,” my mother used to tell me, I let the tones carry me to another land. Where nothing could touch me. Where the silhouettes of the past life are deflected from the force field, unbroken, unbreakable. Stronger than a nation, and beautiful as Aphrodite I let the music take me, and I was taken. It’s just a dream, it’s just a dream… but I knew it wasn’t, I was afraid, I was alone.
As I try to wake myself from this darkness, but each time i pull away from it, it tugs me back into it’s unholy grip. But there is a glow at the end of the tunnel. And each day, each night I try to reach the unreachable. I peek my head out to catch a glimpse of the other world. The light emerging from the crack in the black onyx wall is unpretentiously breathtaking.
A burst of fresh air, the scent of cherry blossoms and vanilla bloom like a steady rainstorm. The turquoise sky permeated by Ten-Thousand rainbows. Clouds of whipped cream and drops of lemons and rosemary infiltrate the heavens... this was my home. But suddenly I am turned to face the darkness. The fear was closing in and I knew I didn’t have much time.
It’s just a dream, It’s just a dream.
I screamed at the top of my lungs. The bittersweet crimson river flowing through the subterranean depths of Hell was now a part of me, a part of my essence, my breath, my vitality, my blood. Hyperventilating as my lungs begin to deteriorate and my soul is torn from my weak, mangled body. My eyes begin to fail as my heartbeat stops... Almost instantly I become paralyzed.
It’s just a dream, It’s just a dream, My spine begins to separate. It’s just a dream It’s just a dream, My hair catches fire and my fingernails are stained black, my brain turns to obsidian, The life I once knew, the heaven in which I called my home is just a memory, washed up on the coast like a companionless aluminum can, and I was breathless, lifeless, dead...
I shot up out of my bed and ran straight to my parents bedroom, my eyes discolored, my makeup smudged with tears. My mother and father ran to me and held me tight, trying to quiet my sobbing...
It was just a dream, It was just a dream.
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