…Why am I in jail?

I looked at the cell bars, which seemed to stretch forever, at some heavy-set woman, who was currently giving me “the eye” and at a police officer, who was on the verge of falling asleep, and literally could not remember a thing…except the start of my morning.

I had woken up late, only to see my clock, an expensive tool that guaranteed the battery to last for at least three months, was blank. The battery had died, but that had not been a problem. Sure, I would be late for work, but I could just explain what happened. So, I had grabbed a cup of hot coffee and…

I had tripped! That’s right. I had tripped, spilling the coffee all over me. So I went back inside to change and did not make it to work until about ten o’clock, an hour late.

What happened after that? I knew it had something to do with my boss….Oh yeah! I had requested a meeting with him, forgetting that the files I needed for said meeting was back at home.

He had yelled something about irresponsibility, threatening to demote me…I can’t remember…

I had then returned to my desk to find a stack of…something…oh papers! I had needed to make a copy of them. So I went downstairs to the copier and there had been a sign…

It said something about it being jammed because of someone overloading the machine when requesting 100 copies all at once. I…had gone upstairs and kept busy until lunch.

Lunch for me was a strawberry and crème frappuccino, a refreshing drink after a horrible beginning, and a piece of lemon pie, a delectable treat, from Starbucks, everyday. Something happened on the way there…I think someone had pushed me while on the sidewalk. I had fallen…and broken my heel, that’s right! So on the rest of the way to Starbucks, I had to hold my shoes in my hand.

In line, I had stopped to smooth out my leggings and I’m pretty sure some guy had line-jumped me.

I think he had been the same guy who had pushed me… Also, he may have ordered the last piece of lemon pie. So as I beat the guy with the shoe that still had a heel, I had remembered…I had left the curling iron on before I had left for work.

But even after remembering all of this, I still don’t see why I’m in…

…oh…