All Nonfiction
- Bullying
- Books
- Academic
- Author Interviews
- Celebrity interviews
- College Articles
- College Essays
- Educator of the Year
- Heroes
- Interviews
- Memoir
- Personal Experience
- Sports
- Travel & Culture
All Opinions
- Bullying
- Current Events / Politics
- Discrimination
- Drugs / Alcohol / Smoking
- Entertainment / Celebrities
- Environment
- Love / Relationships
- Movies / Music / TV
- Pop Culture / Trends
- School / College
- Social Issues / Civics
- Spirituality / Religion
- Sports / Hobbies
All Hot Topics
- Bullying
- Community Service
- Environment
- Health
- Letters to the Editor
- Pride & Prejudice
- What Matters
- Back
Summer Guide
- Program Links
- Program Reviews
- Back
College Guide
- College Links
- College Reviews
- College Essays
- College Articles
- Back
As the Cat Sayeth
In the beginning, there was the Cat.
And the Cat did awake from its sleep, and The Cat did indeed see true darkness. This the Cat was hereby not accustomed to, and indeed The Cat did then release a cry of distress in the Language of the Divine.
But the Owner didn’t know the Language of the Divine, and it sounded like “MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGEGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGERRRRRRRRRRRRRRWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!”
And the Cat was for a good moment pleased, for the Owner did take the evil force known as the Beach Towel off of the Cage that held The Cat within, and The Cat did see that there was much to bee seen.
But all was not well, for the Cat, indeed, did see that the hailed divinity known as Food Dish, was then empty. And once again, in the Language of the Divine, did release a great cry, that roused the Owner and caused the Food Dish to be filled with the Holy Sight of Fat Free, Salmon Oil soaked, Divine Grilled Tuna with Milk, and the Cat was greatly pleased, but for only a moment.
For the Cat did see the Significant Other of the Owner within the Car, that was indeed headed to the evil force of Veterinarian. And so, the Cat decided that then on the Cat would be mortally terrified of Family Style Kentucky Fried Chicken, and did let loose The Loudest Cry that could be uttered by The Cat, thus causing The Significant Other of the Owner to slam the brakes, crash into a police car, and did spill his Family Style Kentucky Fried Chicken all over.
And the Cat was pleased.
But a few Hours later, the Owner did take the Cage and Lift it up, thus holding the Cat within up in the air. And the Cat was sore displeased, and did then confirm that everybody in the Parking Lot that lay about had their great ugly Human ears rent asunder, and the Cat was momentarily pleased, until the Owner did enter the Veterinary Building.
And as the Cat did see the evil Vet, the Cat did declare that the Vet was evil, and did quietly unlatch the door of the Cage without notice of the Vet, and then proceeded to wreak Havoc in the form of knocking over syringes, screeching, flinging Family Style Kentucky Fried Chicken, scratching the Significant Other of the Owner, and attempting to devour the Vet alive.
And the Cat was pleased.
Similar Articles
JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 0 comments.