Let her go.

  We’ve all heard the saying “if you love someone, let them go”, right? Well that’s exactly what I had to do.   Her name was Saskia Duncan. What a name. It rolls off of your tongue like the way paint glides onto a canvas. Her beauty was indescribable. She had hair as intense as fire that keeps you warm on cold winter nights. Her eyes were as blue as a sparkling diamond. Freckles as countless as the stars in the sky. Her soul was like no other. She was kind, like a gentle mother, grateful like a starving child who just had their first meal in two days, but most of all she was selfless. Always put others before her. Now that you have an idea of her,

  I’m going to tell you about the night of December 29th, 2013.  The night itself was rainy, cold, and it was late. Saskia had just turned 27 the previous day, so we wanted to go out and celebrate. She wanted to drive, and I let her. We started arguing. It was over something stupid. She was yelling. She parked at a stop sign. After that there was silence. The kind of silence right before someone gets killed in a horror movie. A bad silence.            

The next thing I hear is a screeching of tires and in one second our car was flipped over. The next thing I heard was the sound of an ambulance and watching my precious Saskia being rolled on a gurney. She went into the first ambulance and I was rushed into the second. I don’t remember anything else from the ride to the hospital because they sedated me. I woke up in excruciating pain. When I look around the room I see nurses. I’m hooked up to all kinds of machines. I try and sit up and the nurses jump and stop me. The second nurse gets the doctor. I lay back down. All that is going through my mind is about Saskia. Is she okay? Where is she? The doctor has a grim look on his face, and I suddenly know the answers to my questions. He tells “I did everything I could” I didn’t freak out, I didn’t scream. I just sat. I went numb. I couldn’t feel my tongue and my mouth was dry. I didn’t even know my name. Suddenly, my head swarms with thoughts. “Why did I let her drive?””This can’t be serious.””this is all my fault”. My blood pressure rises and one of the nurses puts something into my IV. As I fell asleep I could see the doctors rolling away a covered gurney, which had to be none other than Saskia.

The next couple of months were physical recovery. Physical therapy, exercise, and a lot of rest. The mental recovery was painful. More pain than any human should ever have to undergo. I would go places and be reminded of her everywhere I went. For some reason everything I saw reminded me of her. 19 Years of being with the person I loved all washed away by one person. “If you love someone let them go” It has been 3 years and by writing this I can let you go, Saskia. I love you.

    Yours truly, Bennet.