This was the day I was going to do it. Standing by the door, I could see her through the window. I put my arms at my side and lifted my head up, willing my body to maintain an air of fake confidence until I could replace it with the real thing. Taking a deep breath, I slammed the door to the bookstore open. The door hit the inner wall with more force than I intended and a shockingly loud bang resonated in the space. I inwardly cringed, but marched inside rigidly. The door swung shut behind me, ringing those cute little bells hanging on the doorframe. Bookshelves lined the walls, but I was not interested in those titles and promised myself that I would not again feign fascination as I had been doing for the past week.

My eyes were only on her. Her pale yellow blouse was obscured by the armful of paperbacks she was carrying, and her long red hair fell into a curtain over the books. She stood up from the lower shelves as I approached and faced me. Through parted strands of hair, I could read the name tag I had been sneaking glances at for the past week: Nina. I felt my face grow hot.

“Hi! Can I help you find something?” she said. Nina said. Now was my chance. From a strategic position amidst the graphic novels, most of the bookstore fell into my field of view. Over the course of the week, I watched Nina roam the labyrinths of genres with a stack of books in her arms. Often, when shelving them, Nina would linger in the poetry aisle. But my lips wouldn’t move. Beads of sweat formed above my lips as they tried to form “poetry.”

“If you are just browsing, I can point you towards something you’ll like. What are you interested in?” she said. This was my big chance. I opened my mouth to initiate my plan, to launch a conversation over our favorite genres of writing...

“I’m looking for, uh, in uhh...Romance!” What? No! My face flushed and I hastily coughed to disguise my embarrassment.

“Excuse me? Did you say romance?”

I smiled meekly. No going back now. “Y-yeah.”

“Right over there,” she said, pointing. “Next to the biographies.”

“Thanks.”

Defeated, I scurried over to the bookshelves she had pointed to. What happened to poetry? I hid my crimson face with the first book I pulled out; something with a flashy cover dotted with hearts. I snapped it open and stuck my nose into a random page, pretending that yes, this was the book I was reading and yes, this random page I opened to just happened to be exactly where I left off. I sunk into the table beside the bookshelf and tried to figure out what I did wrong.

Was it not obvious that I was trying to ask her out? I’ve been coming to this bookstore every day for a week now, training my nerves so that they would be strong enough to talk to her, and what happens? When I finally do talk to her, all she does is point me to the trashy romance section so that I can hide my shameful head in a stupid book. Groaning, I planted my book, with my face still attached, on the table. She probably thought that I’m one of those weirdos who reads this teenage-drama crap in my free time, and not the sophisticated literary expert that I wanted her to think I was. Ugh, I could have said anything. Why did I have to say romance? I banged my head against the pages, perfectly aware that I didn’t even look like I was reading. Any person randomly walking by would be able to tell instantly that I am recovering from a shaming incident, making me look even weirder. I banged my head into my book again. What a mess you are, Peter. What a total, pungent mess.

“Hey, there. Mind if I sit?” It was a female voice, but it had a higher pitch than Nina’s. I nodded into my book. I wasn’t sure if she saw it, but I felt the table vibrate as she adjusted the seat across from me and sat. With a groan, I promoted my head from faceplant to upright with my chin still resting on the pages. She was pretty cute, with braided blonde hair and a scattering of freckles across her nose. She grinned. “Girl problems?”

“Is it really that obvious?” I muttered, wishing that I didn’t already know that yes, it was really that obvious.

“Well, a little bit. But to be honest, I’ve actually been watching you make eyes at that lady since last Wednesday. It’s pretty cute!”

I felt my face burn with the fury of a thousand sunburns. “C-cute?” was all I could manage.

“Yeah!” She dropped her head onto the table so that she was eye level with me and her chin was on the table. Her eyes took on a new glitter of seriousness as her voice dropped to a whisper. “But also a little bit pathetic.”

Um, what? “Huh?” I said, lifting my head a few inches off the pages.

“Yeah, look, not to hurt your feelings or anything, but I’ve actually been waiting for you to give up.”

“You have?”

“You’ve been staring at Nina since I first came here, last Wednesday, and you’ve barely made any progress in asking her out.”

“That’s none of your business,” I said, returning my tomato face to the indiscernible squiggles of the book I was pretending to pretend to read. She sat up, arms raised in defense.

“Hey, like I said, pal, no offense.”

“Why do you care?”

“Because I’m a considerate person. I thought it was common dignity to make sure you used up all your luck before I give mine a spin.” Every one of her movements were overly dramatic, like she was an actress in one of those kids shows where the characters all break the fourth wall. She gestured to herself and pointed at me again with such energy it made me dizzy. “You were here first, and it’s only fair. But you’re still here. And I’m honestly getting tired of waiting for you to cut your losses and cut it out. So I thought I would have to just go straight out and ask you.”

I met her eyes again. “Ask me what?” She hesitated, and a drop of nervousness slipped through her confident facade.

“Well, I know you like her. But, the thing is, I’m looking for a date, too. So…?” She trailed off, blushing profusely.

“Oh, wow,” I breathed, sitting up. “Um, okay. I mean, I’ve seen you around the shop, too, but I had no idea you had those feelings.”

“So, do you mind? I know you like her.”

“No, you seem very nice, and you’re definitely cute, so I think you...deserve a chance?”

“Oh, thank you! I knew you would understand.” I reached for her hand from across the table but missed as she sprang up from her chair. “Ah, I’m sorry this is so sudden, but you’re being a better sport than I imagined!” She ruffled my hair and I smiled a little bit, slightly caught off guard but still pleased with the turn of events.

“So, do you want to go--” I started to stand up to face her. I turned to where she was ruffling my hair a second ago, but she was gone.

I craned my head around the store, looking for her pale yellow hair. I found it by the poetry section, intertwined with crimson locks.

“Hey--!” I started to call, but I stopped, realizing I didn’t know her name. I fell silent, and fragments of dialogue wafted towards my ear.

“Nina, is it?” she said eagerly. “Name’s Kate! Can I help you with those books?”

“Oh, it’s okay. I’ve got it,” Nina smiled, and I instantly felt jealous. She never gave me a full smile like that.

“No, I insist! The sooner you stack these books, the sooner you get off, right?”

“Yeah, that’s the goal,” Nina said. The blonde girl stole a few books from the top of Nina’s pile and stuck them into the shelves. She beamed.

“So what do you say to this? I help you, you get off early, and we go out and grab some coffee together in your newfound time? My treat!” she winked at Nina, and I was the one who blushed. Despite my paralyzing astonishment, I couldn’t help but wonder: Is this how you’re supposed flirt?

Nina chuckled and pulled Kate’s haphazardly stacked books down from the shelf. “It’s a deal, but you’re going to have to learn where to stack these. You don’t want my boss to give me overtime, now, do you?”

Kate glanced over her shoulder and saw me staring. She grinned and shot me a thumbs-up. I nodded a little bit and quickly turned away.

Feeling vaguely ill and bloated from embarrassment, I stumbled to the door. I was passing the front desk when I realized that I still had the trashy romance novel in my hand. The last thing I wanted to do was turn around and put it back, or be anywhere near Nina or the blonde girl again.  

“‘Tragic Tales of Unrequited Love’?” the elderly cashier asked me. I looked up sharply before realizing that she was just talking about the title of the book as she bagged it. “Having a bad day, son?”

I just grunted and handed her the money.