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Destroy not create
Emptiness is all I feel. It surrounds me devours me. All I hear is tears hitting the floor as they run down my face. I can’t be bothered to wipe them away I deserve this. Loneliness is all I smell. But I am the one who caused this. Blood from my broken heart is all I taste. But I broke my own heart this time it wasn’t you. I have no one else to blame for this beside myself.
When you were here you numbed the pain. Showed me something new. Your voice put me back to sleep when I woke up from these nightmares. Your blood was the sweetest thing. I miss it. Your smell made me smile. And burned a hole into my mind that I will never forget. I took you for granted. I loved you to hard. I suffocated you.
It didn’t surprise me when I opened that door you left. But when you left you took the only candle with you the only light I had. Now I sit here. In the darkness tried but can’t sleep. You had a room in my heart. I can’t fill it no matter how hard I try.
I can’t sleep because you in my dreams.
I tried to move on. Like how you did. Trying to prove to myself that I don’t need you nor want you. Like how you don’t need me nor want me.Trying to convince myself that our love story was just a dream. That I could never get back. Just move on, they say but it’s not that easy when everywhere I go there is something that reminds me of you. I was the one who let you go so why am I the broken one.
But at least one of us gets the happily ever after that you definitely deserve. It’s just hard knowing that your happily ever after doesn’t consent of me. All I wanted was to show your love. To listen to your problems. To see you smile.
But instead I did the opposite. All I showed you was pain. All I did was cause problems not take them away. I caused you pain not happiness.
It hurts me knowing that your eyes have cried quite a few tears. That your smile has disappeared quite a few times. That your heart has been broken quite a few times.
So what did I do. I broke your heart made your cry and made your smile go away.
All I wanted to do was help but I should of know that I’m not a helper I destroy not create.
And I destroyed our love.
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