Saturday, 3:17 am
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Hi Alice, it’s me John. Look, I’m sorry for what happened. I tried to go after you, but you didn’t stop to let me explain! You were not supposed to see that… The girl from yesterday is my cousin, and I was just helping her out. After all, she just moved into town! I really didn’t want you guys to meet like that, and she feels awful that you saw that scene; I was just helping her with some sauce that fell on her clothes! I know it sounds really weird, but that is the truth. So can you call me so that we can talk? Ok, I’ll wait for it. Bye. ”
Beep.
Saturday, 10:22 am
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Hey Alice, it’s me again, John. Why didn’t you call me yet? I was up waiting for the call the rest of the night… Where are you? Tell me so I can meet you and explain better. Last night I was a little drunk, and I didn’t explain the situation right! Sorry for that. Anyways, don’t forget that tomorrow we have to go to that dinner at the senior center in my honor. The guys really appreciated my donation… Call me ok? I already miss you and I am really sorry for everything that happened last night and for that stupid message! Call me!”
Beep.
Saturday, 3:21 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Alice, I know you got my message. Why didn’t you call me? I’m really desperate. I called Lucy and Brian to see if they heard anything from you, but they refused to tell me anything! What did you tell them that happened? They sounded really mad at me! I already told you what happened. That girl from last night is my cousin that just moved here from Arkansas. You know my Aunt Helen, right? So, it’s her daughter Diana, and my mom made me show her around town and help her move and settle. See? No big deal, so can you stop being stubborn and call me please? You are worrying me. If you don’t call me, I’ll go crazy! Please, please, please, call me. Ok, talk to you soon.”
Beep.
Saturday, 7:46 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Look, I know that you are there, so why don’t you just pick up the freaking phone? I get it that you are mad at me, but that is enough. It’s time to stop being a child and start acting like the adult that you are. Come on? You think I’m dumb? I made Brian tell me what you think that happened, and tell you what, you are wrong! So forgive me and call me for God’s sake! Bye.”
Beep.
Sunday, 1:09 am
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Alice! I know you are there! Come on babe, pick up the phone. I promise I won’t be mad at you. Just kidding, I will, but I promise you that I’ll forgive you quickly. Ok, babe? Look. I have a confession to make. I overreacted. I shouldn’t have been mad at you for not picking up the phone or for not returning my calls. And you know why? I don’t know why I am asking because you don’t know. It’s because the woman that you saw me with is my wife. Yeah, my wife. Surprising huh? Well, I didn’t want you to know like that, but since you saw us at the restaurant, I figured I could lie. After all, a restaurant is not that much of a compromising place… But you know what? I’m tired of lying. My wife also saw you, so she wants a divorce. My life is just great, right? I don’t expect you to call me after what I told you, but I would be so happy if you did! Oh, and forget about the dinner too. I canceled it. Alright. Bye!”
Beep.
Monday, 12:38 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Except if you are John. Beep.
“Hello Alice. I noticed that you changed your voicemail message. But I hope it’s not true though… Look, I freaked out on Sunday, but I just wanted to get your attention. Apparently, I succeeded. I lied on my last message. I was drunk again. I’ve never been married before; I just wanted to see if you would feel bad for me and finally call me. Apparently, I did not succeed… But now I’m going to tell you the truth. She was not my cousin, she was my ex. But I swear, do you hear me, I swear that nothing happened. It was just a reunion between old friends. Now, I would really like to have a meeting with you! So, if you don’t want to talk on the phone with me, you can call my assistant and she will arrange some time so we can meet at my office. Her number is 510-389-6785; she will be expecting your call. Thanks, hopefully I will talk to you soon! Bye, John.”
Beep.
Tuesday, 12:12 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Hello Alice! It’s me again. I just wanted to let you know how glad I am that you scheduled a meeting! I will be waiting for you tomorrow afternoon at 3 p.m. Ok? Oh, and thank you for changing the voicemail message. It means a lot to me. Thanks, and see you tomorrow! John.”
Beep.
Wednesday, 3:20 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Hi, mmm… Alice? Hm, can you pick up the phone? I just want to know if you are going to be any later… Anyway, call me if you will. If you don’t call me, I’ll assume you will be here at any time. See you soon!”
Beep.
Wednesday, 3:55 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Alice, I know that you are still mad at me, but that doesn’t mean that you can schedule a meeting in my office, when I could be giving my attention to a client, and simply not show up because you don’t feel like it. And you also don’t pick up your stupid phone when I really need to talk to you. If you still plan on talking to me call my assistant and she will see if I will have any free time to waste next week. Bye.”
Beep.
Wednesday, 5:58 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“Oh my God. I’m soooo sorry Alice. I know you will never hear this message, but I need to say these words out loud before I go crazy. Look, I really wanted to tell you something earlier today, but you never gave me the opportunity to say them in person… I loved you. I really, utterly and incredibly loved you. I could list a thousand reasons for why I do, but that would take too long and both you and I don’t have any time in our lives – or after life – for that many reasons… I just really need to say a few of them, though… The way you smile every time you saw Brian and Lucy together would be only one of my examples. The way your hair always fell perfectly, even when you had just woken up; the way your eyes shined when you saw me walking towards you; the way you made me feel every time I woke up with you in my arms; the way you twisted your hair around your finger every time you were worried; and the way you clenched your fist and raised your eyebrows every time you were mad at me, which happened a lot lately unfortunately… What I really can’t stand is the fact that was all my fault. I mean, if it wasn’t for me insisting on the meeting, you wouldn’t have left your work early, the ac…”
Beep.
Wednesday, 6:01 pm
Hey! Here is Alice, at this moment I’m probably busy, but leave a message after the beep and I’ll return your call later! Beep.
“S***! I hate this stupid message! Where was I before being rudely interrupted by your stupid voicemail? Oh, the accident. The accident wouldn’t have happened and you would be here now, listening to this message… Alice, I don’t know how to live without you anymore, the last couple of days were a mess without you and I really can’t see a whole life time without you. All I wanted was you. That’s why I’m doing what I’m doing. You are the only one that would understand me. I love you. See you soon. John.”
Beep. Beep. Beep.

“That’s it,” said officer Williams. “That was the last message left by John Brown before his hanging.”
“Oh well, poor thing. That’s why I gave up on love,” replied Sheriff Harrison. “I guess that settles the case. Come on, we have to go. Erica is waiting for us to get dinner.”