A player. That’s all I was. I didn’t mind being that kind of guy though. Someone had to be one of those guys, and I guess that was me. It’s starting to get late into the night, and the party I’m at is starting to get good. More and more girls are starting to come, and the ones that arrived earlier were already drunk. They’re easier when they’re drunk.
The other day one of my teachers said that guys look at girls visually. I had to smile at that because for me, I know it’s true. I like to go for the type of girls that have nice curves. I don’t like them too skinny or too chubby. Of course, they have to have a nice chest and ass for something to grab onto.
I make my way through the crowd of sweaty people and spot her. She was a little shorter than me, brunette, and bright green eyes. She has a smile on her face as she looks over at me, seeing that I’m staring. I smile and her cheeks flush red. Her friends notice and look over at me, their eyes widening. Girls know that if I’m looking at them, it’s something big. I smirk to myself as I walk towards the girl who is nervously glancing at me, then to her friends. “Hi,” I say my smile widening. Her friends smile at me, and then walk away, leaving the two of us alone. I like it when it’s just the two of us.
“Uh, hi,” she finally says.
“I’m Cameron, what’s your name?” Her green eyes stare into mine as the redness in her cheeks deepens. “Faith.” I stare at her. The name actually suited her. “You’re very pretty,” I say. Faith’s eyes widen; I could almost laugh at her facial expression. I can tell that no one really tells her that, especially guys. “Do you wanna go upstairs with me? I think there’s an empty room,” I ask. Her head bobs up and down. I grab her hand, and lead her up the stairs to the room that I found earlier. We both walk into the room, as I shut the door behind me. Faith stands in the middle of the room, staring at me with her big eyes. I smile sweetly at her, and slowly inch myself closer and closer to her.
She smelled like candy, not too strong like most girls. I see her lick her lips, only making me want more. My lips are just about to touch hers, when she backs away from me. “I’m sorry, I can’t.” I stare at her baffled. She didn’t want to hook up? Most girls would jump at the chance, especially if it’s with me. “Why not?” Faith continues to stare at me. “I’ve never kissed a guy, and not to offend you, I just don’t want it to be with you.” I continue to stare at her as the words process in my mind. “But I can make your first time the best.” Faith shakes her head. “But I want it to be special, with someone who actually likes me.” She brushes past me and is out the out the door within seconds. For the first time in my life, I was the one rejected.
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The next day at school, I spot Faith in the hallway. “Faith!” I shout, walking towards her. She turns around, her eyes staring into mine.
“Hey Cameron.” She smiles sweetly at me, and picks her pace back up now that I'm next to her.
“So, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out after school.” I look down at her as she continues to smile. Her face wasn’t turning red like last night, which meant she was getting used to being around me.
“Sorry, I can’t. I have homework and studying to do. Thanks for the offer though.” She waves at me, and walks down a hallway. I stand there in the middle of the pathway, staring. I had just been rejected again. I cared now. She was a challenge, and I like challenges.
“Hey man, how was the party last night?” My best friend Carter walks up to me. “Did you get any?”
I laugh. “No Carter, for once in my life I didn’t.” Carter looks shocked.
“You didn’t hook up with anyone last night? What is this world turning to?” I punch him in the arm. “Don’t worry, I’m working on it.” Carter’s eyebrows rise.
“What’s her name?” I see Faith down the hall from where I’m standing, and see her glance at me.
“Her name is Faith.” I look away from her, and back to Carter.
“Faith Miller? The richest, and prettiest girl in school?” I nod my head, wearing a stupid grin.
“Faith Miller,” I repeat.
“So how are you going to get her?” Carter asks me. I shrug. I honestly had no clue. Faith isn’t like the stuck up rich snobs. She was friends with people who weren’t as wealthy as she was, and always had a smile on her face. She was the nicest girl in school. Faith was also a straight A student. In every way that you looked at her, she was the perfect girlfriend. “Hey man, Spring Break is coming up. Any plans?” I had almost forgotten about Spring Break. A light bulb instantly lit up.
“Yeah I do. I’m going to hook up with Faith.” I flash Carter a smile, and head towards Faith who is still standing with her friends. “Hey Faith.” All of her friends stare at me. This was the perfect opportunity. “I was wondering if you want to hang out during break.” Faith stares at me, then looks over at her friends.
“Oh I don’t know—,” she starts before being cut off.
“Faith, all you’re going to do is stay at home and read. Just go out with him,” one of her friends with blond hair says. I smile at her, silently thanking her for the push.
“Fine, but only one day,” Faith agrees. I smile at her.
“I’ll pick you up at eleven Saturday.” I wink at her as I leave. As I start to walk away, I could hear the high pitch giggles from the course of her friends. I continue to smile as I walk back to where Carter is still standing.
“What’d she say?” he asks me. I smirk at him and say, “Let’s just say it’s going to be a good break.” Carter smiles and bunches me.
“Damn dude, you’re about to be legend!” I laugh along with him.
“I know,” I say just before walking into my final class for the day.
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The rest of the school week passes by quick, and before I know it, I’m driving down the road to pick up Faith. Faith’s house isn’t hard to find at all. In fact, everyone in school knows where it is. Her house is one of the biggest in the city. It has its own bridge and everything. As soon as I pull up in front of the house, Faith comes bounding out the house. She smiles, and gets into the car, shutting the door behind her.
“So where are we going?” she asks right off the bat.
“I haven’t decided yet,” I admit. “But we’ll figure it out on the way.”
I pull out of the long driveway and continue down the road. I decided to take her to my house. No one would be home, and I figured that would be the perfect opportunity.
“Can I ask you some questions?” I say, breaking the ice.
“Sure.”
I make a sharp turn at the light and think about a good question to ask. “What’s your favorite color?” Faith bursts out laughing.
“Seriously? You want to ask me some questions, and this is what you ask? Guys like you wouldn’t ask something as absurd as that.”
I stare at her as I stop the car at a stoplight as she continues to laugh. “You never answered my question,” I say seriously.
“Lavender,” she says wiping tears from the corner of her eyes. “Can I ask you something now?”
“Anything,” I reply.
“Why are you with me right now?”
I sit motionless. Did she really just ask that? I continue to drive thinking about how to answer that question. I knew I couldn’t just come out and say because I want to f*** you. So I went with my alternative. “Because I want to get to know you better.” This was true. I did want to get to know her better.
“I don’t believe you,” she says, staring at me. I roll my eyes, and pull up into my driveway. I walk over to the passenger side and open the car door for her. Faith stares at my house as I walk up the driveway to the front door.
“Is this your house?” she asks.
“Yep,” I say as I unlock the door. “My parents are at work and won’t be home until later tonight, which means we have to house to ourselves.” Faith walks in and looks around the living room. “I thought we could order pizza and you can pick out a movie,” I continue.
“Okay,” she agrees. I show her to where the movies are and let her look through them as I order pizza. As I hang up with the pizza place, I feel my phone vibrate. It was a text from carter. Did you get any yet?? ;) I roll my eyes and reply. I decided to get to know her better. I don’t want to take advantage of someone like her.
“Did you pick a movie yet?” I shout.
“No!” she replies.
Man you’re turning into a softy. I ignore this message from Carter and head back to the living room with Faith. She hands me the movie she picked and I put it into the DVD player. For the next half hour, we stayed glued to the television up until the pizza got there.
“I got pepperoni. You eat meat right?” I ask opening up the pizza box.
“Of course I eat meat!” She smiles at me and doesn’t even hesitate to take a bite of her pizza. I smile at her as she takes another bite. “What? She asks?” I continue to smile and grab a napkin.
“You have sauce here.” I dab the napkin on her chin, becoming closer to her then I have ever been. I lower the napkin and continue to stare into her eyes. Before I could stop myself, I was leaning in and softly kissing her. For a second Faith hesitated, but kissed me back. I smile against the kiss, but she pulls away.
“I think you should take me home,” she says, not even looking me in the eyes.
“But the pizza just got here,” I say, confused.
“I just want to go home.” Her voice wavered. She sounded like she was on the verge of tears, and I didn’t want to push her any further. So, I grabbed my keys off the counter and drove Faith back to her house. When I got back home, the pizza was still sitting on the counter. So I grabbed the whole box and took it up to my room. I sit there on the floor in front of my bed eating the pizza, wondering what the hell I did wrong. As I’m halfway through a piece, my phone rings. It was a number I didn’t know, but answered anyways.
“Hello?”
“Cameron, thank God you answered. It’s Jennifer. Faith, she…” I hear a sob on the other side as I try to figure out what happened. “This is Jennifer. Faith, she killed herself.” My heart fell to the pit of my stomach, the phone falling from my hand. I take a deep breath before picking up the phone from the floor.
“What do you mean?” Faith couldn’t have killed herself. I just know.
“I went to her house shortly after you dropped her off. I walked inside and saw her, on the floor in a pool of blood… Oh God.” Jennifer sobs again, and I try so hard to contain myself.
“Faith wouldn’t do something like that,” I say.
“But she did! Your kiss is what drove her to it! She saw that she started to have feelings for you, and she didn’t want a reason to stay. So she stabbed herself to death.”
“No,” I say quietly. “Thanks for telling me Jennifer,” I say as I hang up.
I throw my phone in anger. I bunch the wall, kick my bed, I scream at the top of my lungs, anything to keep me from crying. I stand there, staring at the hole in the wall as I try to calm my breath. A sob escapes my mouth. I fall to the ground and bury my face into my hands and just cry. I sit there for what seems like hours just crying.
Crying was something I rarely did. So when my mom came home and saw my laying on the floor with blood shot eyes, she knew something terrible had to have happened. I sat there in my mom’s arms telling her what happened to Faith.
“I liked her a lot,” I say. “She was different than any other girl.”
“I know honey, but not everyone can be saved.”

“I wish I could’ve saved her,” I whisper. I look up at the ceiling and wish that Faith were still here.