It seemed like I had found the end of the world when my foot scuffed at the edge of the cliff’s end. The felt wind colder, stronger, more vicious than it had felt at home as it whipped around my poorly wrapped body, (only wearing a dark green tank with a grey pullover jacket and ripped jeans) trying to find it’s true target; the place is was going to aim for to purely freeze my soul.  I shivered and kneeled to the ground, wrapping my arms around myself hoping that it would help the cold, but finding that to be unsuccessful also to keep the cold away.
It will only take a few steps. A few steps and you’ll be air, floating like all the other forgotten ones in this world.
My mind whispered the little reminders in my ear, reminding me why I’m here. Reminding me of my final journey.

They won’t remember you. You’ll just be a forgotten memory that dances through the empty spaces of their minds.

I kept thinking about Caleb. I kept thinking about the way he pushes his blonde waves of hair to the side of his face every morning. How his car smelled of slightly burnt barbecue from his job at the meat vendors. I kept thinking about his jacket I had kept until this morning that was warm no matter what, and had a smell that couldn’t be distinguished by normal words, it was just him in his purist of forms sewed in-between leather and wool. I thought about his ridiculous obsession with sports teams I could care less about, but how his dedication to support a losing team was adorable and made me want to cheer along too.

He doesn’t want you anymore Mia. That’s why you guys fought, why you’ve been fighting. He isn’t here for you anymore, who do you have left?

The voice was questioning me. It was forcing me to think about anyone else who would miss me. My mother and Ky I thought would miss me. Ky and I might have sibling rivalries, but we still loved each other. Mom worked a lot, so it wasn’t her fault we didn’t get to bond much. Julia would miss me I’m sure. She’s been by my side since birth it seems, she was basically my other separated half. I remembered shopping with her, watching her whip out her debit card she stocked with her work money, and buying things that were on discount so she could save money and still get the good stuff. I loved her constantly changing hair color from dark woody browns to lighter shades of blonde, going through colors like a paint splotch at Home Depot. I also loved sharing my secrets with her, especially about Caleb because our dating territory was so new for me. I mean a sophomore dating a senior isn’t exactly the typical age barrier.

If they love you so much, then why aren’t they here? Why aren’t they here to stop you?

I thought too hard about what the voice said. I felt tears clouding up in my eyes, awaiting the permission to drop down to the crown and start my own river of sadness. My voice caught on a single cry, and I involuntarily scotched closer to the cliff’s edge; feeling the free-fall air below my left knee. I hugged myself tighter, wanting the word’s not to be true, make the voices be wrong, but they weren’t. I wiped away my straggling tears and stood up, courageously looking down into the black abyss of the canyon. A shiver ran up my spine at the height, but I couldn’t chicken out now, I knew what I had to do. Suddenly the screeching of tires comes in the distance, and a car parked right next to my car which I had left the keys in. Two forms appeared: Caleb and Julia. Caleb’s face was white with terror, racing at me at

A speed I have never seen him accomplish. Julia is lagging behind; her fancy shoes not helping her speed problem. Caleb shouted out my name, but I ignored it and went back to looking down.

“Mia! Mia wait! What are you doing?” Caleb asked out of breath, closing in on the distance I was comfortable with.
“Stay away Caleb!” I shouted, the tears coming back, “We’re over remember! Just let me go.”
“Mia this is crazy! Get back over here so we can discuss this!” Julia screamed, obviously pissed from the running and the stress.
“Julia I’m sorry, I just can’t anymore. It’s been too much, too fast. It’s eating me alive!” I cried over at her, inching closer to the edge, more fear crawling up my spine. Caleb had been moving very sneakily towards me when I was focused on Julia, and with a good jump he could have reached me. I held my hand up.
“No Caleb! Go away!” I shouted fiercely at him, anger starting to rage its way around my body.
“Mia we need to talk.” Caleb said smoothly and slow, “I know you’re upset about the fights, but everybody fights babe, it’s just a natural thing especially in relationships.”

He inched even closer, reaching for my held out hand. I couldn’t move anything. I was nervous, angry, sad, confused, alone, overcrowded, lost in thought, overthinking, overthinking everything. I felt a rebel tear drop down my face, making the basis of my river of tears. He was whispering sweet nothings at me that I couldn’t understand because he was so quiet, but his voice got me transfixed. Then before I could react a warm hand was on my, and a body was pulled into me.

“Oh god Mia, please don’t ever do this again.” Caleb begged me as he pulled me to his chest. He was warm against my cold skin with his heavy jacket, but even through the layers of the coat I could feel him shaking, almost more than me. I wondered then why in the world was he shaking? He was supposed to calm. Then suddenly,

“And cut! Okay I think we might go back a few a paces and go in at a different angle with camera three and I think we might add a little more gust into the wind when you kneel Maddie, because I didn’t really get the pure power I wanted in that part, okay?” The director asked, I nodded subtly and stood up. I rolled my neck and heard a few more pops than I would have liked, but kneeling there stiff did that to me.

“You okay?” Cam asked as he stood up. He fixed his coat, because I had managed to wrinkle it when I fell into him. He wasn’t necessarily a neat freak, but he preferred things in place. I nodded once again and gave him a small smile. I turned away from him hoping he wouldn’t see me blush. I took a step towards the spot next to the cliff where we needed to reshoot, but then my curiosity got the best of me and I turned back to see him. He had turned back to head for the stationary cars.

“Cam!” I shouted, and started to walk quickly back to him. He raised an eyebrow when I reached him, the top of it brushing against his perfectly positioned blonde hair.

“Where you okay earlier?” I asked. He looked confused, so I continued, “You were shaking during our ah well my, oh gosh.” I had to stop and re-find my words. I knew I was blushing now, but now he was smiling.

“The scene where you pull me back, why were you shaking? Are you alright? Because I’m not trying to say you were doing the scene wrong, I just thought you were supposed to be calm and all.” I muttered. I was starting to get a stutter when I got nervous, which I swore was something I caught from a friend.

He suddenly blushed too, matching my cheeks in a bright apple red. He looked down and smiled a bit, then turned back to face me, his dark brown eyes transfixed on mine, “That scene always gets to me. When I pull you away I kind of get sucked in, and it makes me worry about you actually going over the cliff and,” he cut off and looked down again. I felt my face burn as my face breaks into a smile, and I leaned forward and kissed him quickly on the forehead. He looked up confused at first, but as I smiled sheepishly he smiled too.

“Okay people let’s start from the top! Maddie! Cam! Let’s get this show on the road!” the director yelled. I dashed back to my spot and kneeled down, trying to get back into character when I glanced back over to Cam. He was still smiling and looking over at me, making it absolutely impossible to think of anything but him.