My leg shook up and down shaking the table. The silverware rattled as my leg went up, down, up, down, up, down.
"Maybe we should start without him, Sweetie," my mother said trying to dispel my discomfort. "He probably just got-"
"No," I clipped. "He's on his way. I know he is." Up, down, up, down.
Silence continued again with only the slight rattle permeating the silence. I could feel my parents' worried gaze on me. I looked down at the napkin on my lap, shaking with my leg.
"Honey, it's getting to be late," my dad started, "and I'm sure you have homework-"
"No. He's on his way. He knows how important this is to me." Up, down, up down.
The steam coming from the chicken began to slow as it cooled. I reached out to grab my water, but shaky hands met the glass and the water spilled. I jumped up and looked at my parents' faces. I kneeled down and grabbed a napkin to begin wiping the water up. My mother sprang forward to help me wipe up the spill. As I began to circle furiously, wiping away the water, my mother grabbed my hands. I looked up at her with glassy eyes. The tears began to trail down my face and join the puddle on the floor.
"Sweetie," my mother started with honey dripping from her voice.
"I'm okay," I said popping back up. My hands went to my eyes and rubbed until the contacts blurred my vision as much as the tears. My mother got up as well and gave my dad a look. I fell backwards into my chair and slumped down. Again my leg started shaking, up, down, up, down. The room again fell silent. I looked back down at my napkin sitting on the floor and pulled myself in until my stomach hit the table, keeping the wet napkin out of my view. Up, down, up, down.
"I heard the funniest thing at work today," my dad says trying to cut the thick cloud of tension in the room. "So Mitch tells me..."
Up, down, up, down.
"And he just keeps saying..."
Up, down, up, down. I could hear both of my parents forcing laughter, but I ignored them.
Where was he? Did he forget? Why wasn't he here? Was he sending me a message? I couldn't figure out what this all meant. I looked back up at my parents' faces. Up, down, up, down.
"May I be excused?" I asked, my voice trembling. My parents exchanged a look then nodded their heads. I ran out of the room, flew up the stair, and barged into my room. I threw myself onto the bed, tears streaking down my face. My body heaved as it tried to make me take deeper breaths.
Up, down, up, down.