The Last Jump | Teen Ink

The Last Jump

January 20, 2016
By Dr_Delicious70 BRONZE, Eau Claire, Wisconsin
Dr_Delicious70 BRONZE, Eau Claire, Wisconsin
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis. You know why? Because we are so... very... pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die." (Malcolm Reynolds)


She walked into the restaurant wearing a black, strapless dress. It seemed to hug her slim body as she walked.
She had to check in with a hostess before she was allowed to the dining tables. After the hostess approved her, she wandered into the dining area. She looked around until her eyes met his. She recognized him and walked over. She sat at the table in the spot across from him. “Felix, right?”
“Yes. And you must be Lass,” He said, returning a smile.
She nodded to him and they reached across the circular table to shake hands. Her eyes wondered down to his neck.  “Bowtie?” she asked.
Felix laughed a little. She always asked about the bowtie. “I like to make a good first impression.”
“Are those little ducks on it?” she pointed across the table.
He looked down, touching his bowtie. “Little ducks with umbrellas.”
She laughed. She picked up her menu and opened it. “Very classy.” She looked at each page for a second before flipping through them. A minute later, she added. “Also ducks are just cute.”
Felix called over the waiter while she looked through the menu. “I’ll have the lasagna with a glass of water and she’ll have…” He looked at her, as if he was examining her. “Salmon with a glass of Elderflower. The older, the better.” He looked to the waiter who nodded and walked to the kitchen with both their menus.
“You read my mind,” She started examining him now. “How did you know salmon was my favorite… and that I was going to order it?” The smile on her face made Felix feel like a cloud. He could see the curiosity, excitement on her face, like a child listening to a magician about reveal the secret to his trick.
He pointed across the room to a mirror on the wall. “From this angle, I can see your menu. You looked at each page for a second, except the one with fish. Then I thought about fish. Bass is too messy, too greasy for a first date. Cod is too common, almost tasteless. Salmon, on the other hand,” he leaned into the table, “is the food all proper Scottish ladies should eat.” She tilted her head and playfully rolled her eyes. “I can hear the Scot in your voice.”
“I’m not exactly a proper Scottish lady.” She looked down at her left arm. It was covered in tattoos from shoulder to elbow. The biggest was a green plant that bloomed purple flowers on the outside of her arm. She looked behind her to see the mirror. “What about the wine?” she asked. “I didn’t finish looking to that part. How did you know that was my favorite as well?”
“Well…I didn’t,” he shamefully admitted. “But I do know Elderflower is a Scottish white wine with a smooth taste that tends to blend nicely with meat dishes. Especially fish, depending on the age. During the ending of the Middle Ages, kings would import green grapes from Sweden. Sweden, the parts that were more civilized than the Vikings surrounding them, had a special farming technique that allowed the grapes to grow much earlier in the spring until winter, when it started to snow. Their biggest importer of those grapes was Scotland and the kings and queens always paid a handful of gold coins for the oldest bottles.”
Across the table she looked at him. From her expression, Felix couldn’t tell if she was impressed or a bit creeped out.  She spoke, “You are by far the biggest nerd I have ever met.” They both laughed at that, loudly enough for some of the people in the restaurant to turn their heads.  Their food arrived and they each had a plate and drink in front of them. “So…” She picked up her glass of white wine. “Did you grow up in the civilized part of Sweden or the not-so civilized part?”
Felix cut into his lasagna and smirked. She was smart to connect those dots. “Let’s just say my ancestors likely grew up pillaging your ancestors.”
She almost looked relieved to hear that. “I thought so.” She raised her glass of wine to the middle of the table. “Well,” she started, “we shouldn’t let the past ruin the present.”
He raised his glass and they both smiled as they touched glasses.
He quickly set his glass down and looked down at his watch. He looked toward the kitchen door. The waiter walked out, carrying a basket of bread rolls. The restaurant served the bread rolls here for free, just for ordering. The waiter would walk, on his way to their table, and trip walking past a woman on her way to the bathroom. He looked back to his watch. In 3…2…1…
Felix suddenly turned his head, looking to a random table. “Jeffrey, is that you?” he asked across the restaurant. Lass watched Felix get up from his chair and walk toward the booth he was looking at. Before Felix got there, the waiter tripped into the woman going to the bathroom. The waiter turned to look at the woman and began stumbling like a newborn giraffe. Before the man fell on his back, the waiter stumbled into Felix, who caught him around his shoulders. Felix pulled the man to his feet. The waiter looked relieved and happily gave Felix the basket of bread. Felix turned to Lass and raised his eyebrows while smiling back to her. She looked impressed.
He walked back to their table and set the basket on their table, between their plates of food. He sat down. She gestured her fork towards him. “You are good.”
Still sitting, Felix bent over into a bow, like a performer.
……………..
The date was going very well. The waiter came by at one point to thank him. He felt like a hero.
Under the table, Felix pulled up the sleeve of his suit, making it look like he was checking his watch again. He had a few interesting questions he wanted to ask her this time through. On his wrist, in permeant marker, he’d written down new questions he wanted to ask her, to learn more about her.
“So, what are you parents like?” he looked up, happily grinning.
They made eye contact and then suddenly, her eyes sunk to her plate. Her bangs dropped across her right eye. “They… died when I was very young. I grew up with foster parents.”
He looked off to the side. He dropped his silverware to the side of his plate. Jesus, Felix. That would explain why on all their previous dates, she never mentioned any family in the conversations at all.  He sighed. Poor girl. He watched her move the salmon pieces around on her plate with her fork. That was likely a touchy subject. Felix guessed she was likely picked up by poor or abusive foster parents. That would be an explanation for the tattoos and strapless, revealing black dress. There wasn’t a father figure around for her upbringing. Their date would not come back from this. She would shut like an exposed clam, trying to keep the world out. 
Felix gripped the table and concentrated very hard. People started walking backwards. People’s food went from their mouths back onto their plates, recreating their meals. Time began to move backwards.
Felix was looking down at his wrist again. Lass looked at him to see what he was doing. She smiled, swallowing her salmon. “So, have I seen you at the dog park before? You look like someone I’ve seen before while walking Sadie.” Felix asked. They chatted about dogs for a while. Turns out, half of the pictures on her phone included her dog.
“So, you really love your dog.” She nodded, happily, taking a sip of wine. “I keep Sadie at my dad’s place, outside of the city. She has more space to roam out there.”
“Dad’s place?” She asked. She was probably asking why it wasn’t his parent’s place. It was strange to hear someone say ‘dad’s place’.
“I never really knew my mother. She passed away while giving birth to me.” That was a lie. His parents got divorced. His mother was still alive. However, Felix wanted to see Lass’s reaction. They could now both relate over dying parents. He wanted to see them connect on a deeper level. He wanted her to really open herself up. He’d seen that Lass before and it was the Lass he’d fell in love with.
Their eyes met and he saw it. He saw the connection. After a night of laughter and intelligent conversation, one line about his mother dying changed Lass. She was finally comfortable letting her guard down. “I was… saved from an abusive household when I was a teenager. I was adopted into a friend’s family in high school. They were very nice. They were poor, but they helped turn my life around.” She looked down to her food and started moving her food around on her plate. He watched her take a deep breath that flowed out with a heavy sigh. “But you probably don’t want to hear that on a first date,” she said to the plate.
Felix didn’t say anything. He reached his hand across the table and placed it over hers.
……………….
They’d taken a cab back to his apartment. The pair sat on the couch. They talked until the digital clock on the table showed it was midnight. “I should probably get going.” Lass said, walking to the door, facing away from him. As much as he wanted her to stay, he couldn’t change the past. This is what happened on their first date. 
He got up, slid her coat over her, like a gentleman, and they told each other goodbye before he opened the door to let her leave his apartment. He peeked outside the door to watch her walk down the hallway and turn the corner down to the stairway, out of sight.
He would never see her again after this date.
The next day Lass Kennedy commits suicide. They find her body washed up along the beach. She jumps off a bridge after letting her dog loose in the dog park.
Felix walked into his bedroom and sat on the bed. It was pathetic, but he’d never forgotten about Lass. One day, you fall in love with a girl on the first date. The next, she’s gone. It was so out of the blue. Felix never found out what drove her to suicide. He didn’t want to know. But for him, this was a day that was bittersweet. He could relive a date with a beautiful, interesting girl, but the entire time, he knew she was already dead.
Felix closed his eyes and concentrated hard and into the future. Time passed and a second later, he was in his dad’s house, seated on his parent’s bed. He walked to the mirror. His knees ached.
Looking in the mirror, his hair was balding to the back of his head. His face was wrinkled. He was 65 years old. His hair was shorter and white. His face was droopy and lines came from the corners of his eyes.
Felix learned he could move time when he was in middle school. One day he focused really hard and the classes began to fly by. If Felix concentrated really, really hard, and thought of a specific time, while thinking of the activity he’d be doing, he could even make large jumps through time.
Slowing and rewinding time was more important though. During college, if he got any questions wrong on a test, he took the test again, and got everything right. At his accounting job, he frequently rewound time to make friends at work. He was promoted to CFO at age thirty-five. It wasn’t hard to climb the corporate ladder with perfect performance and friends in high places. However, work became his life. After Lass, he rarely did things with other people. The day had scarred him too much. Lass was one of those things that you never forget. It sticks with you. Haunts you. Prevents you from experiencing life again. He rarely had any free time anyways. On his days off, he was too exhausted to take a real vacation. Television and video games were more satisfying. 
One thing that made Felix feel better was reliving memories, though the special ones were rare. However, when he was doing this, it was very important he didn’t change the past.  If he decided he was going to skip work and go do something exciting, who knows how that could change the future? If he skipped work, they could fire him, and if they fired him, maybe he wouldn’t live as long. Maybe, when he fast forwarded to the present, he would jump to a point in time where he was dead.  If he forwarded to a point he was dead, he wouldn’t be able to jump again. You’re not supposed to use time travel like a toy. He’d learned that lesson the hard way. He wouldn’t make it worse by dramatically changing the past.
That was why he couldn’t save Lass. Time had called for her that day and time always claims its victims.
Felix walked into his bedroom and reached into his nightstand. He pulled out the Colt .45 pistol his dad had bought for home defense. He placed the gun in his lap and seen that it was still loaded. Felix placed the gun to his temple and closed his eyes.
Lass was by far his favorite memory. She was perfect that night. He felt perfect as well. That one night meant more to Felix than the rest combined.
He was ready to die now. He’d relieved that date with Lass multiple times now. He’d gotten to know her very well. Her favorite color was yellow. That’s why we wore a bowtie with ducks on it. The tattoo on her arm that looked like a tea set was about a friend of hers that moved away. The two used to play house together and she got left with all the toys after they separated. On their first date, she’d ordered salmon and Elderflower wine. That speech about the mirror behind her wasn’t true. He knew what she was going to order.
Felix became obsessed with learning more about Lass. He just found her fascinating. He’d only met her once in the present, but he’d made lifetimes worth of memories through that one date. However, he knew he couldn’t keep going back to see Lass. He could only guess what it was doing to the fabric of time. Also, Felix was ashamed of what he was doing. You can’t keep reliving one night and calling it love. That wasn’t a real relationship. Lass was just a happy memory. That’s all she was.
Felix couldn’t keep going like this. It was wrong to cling to life by continuing to jump back in time. It halted the present for everyone else. The world would not move forward until he was dead. Felix would not move forward until he could let go of Lass. She was just some girl who killed herself. It wasn’t meant to be, Felix thought. He put the gun to his head and got ready to fire.
…………………….
He couldn’t do it. Felix dropped the gun onto the floor. It landed with a thud on the brown carpet. He’d been trying for an hour. He sat in silence, thinking of Lass. He didn’t really want to die. But it had to happen eventually.
Finally, Felix reached a solution. One more time, he told himself. And this would be the last time.
……………………….
Felix was back in the restaurant again.  Lass arrived as usual. They joked around, Felix saved the waiter, and Lass answered his final questions. After they ate, the two got in a cab back to his apartment.
Inside his apartment, the two sat on the couch. It was midnight again. “I should probably get going.” She stood up and began walking to the door.
Please, not yet. This was the last time he’d allow himself to see Lass.
When Felix got up to put her coat over he shoulders, he froze. He set her coat back on the hanger. Lass stood with her back to him, waiting for her coat. She turned to him standing behind her. She looked confused. He placed a hand on her face and pressed his lips over hers.
He’d never kissed her before. He’d relived this point more times than he could count, but every night she left at this time. He’d never ever kissed her before.
The kiss felt incredibly warm. He felt the heat pass up through his stomach and into his chest. The kiss seemed to hold still for an eternity. It felt like time had stopped and let him enjoy this last pleasure.
She finally pulled away. His hands travelled to her hips and pulled her into his body. Their eyes met and for a minute, they just looked at each other. Her words broke the silence. “Why do I feel like I’ve met you before?”
Felix didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t tell her the truth. “Can I see you again? There has to be a way that I can see you again.” There was desperation in his voice.
“Of course you can see me again.” Lass tried to calm him. “Like a date? Again?”
“Whatever, I don’t care what it is; I just need to see you again.” His body leaned over hers.
“I’d like that,” she smiled, looking up at him. “But, I have to go now.” She wormed her way around him, walked to the apartment door, then turned back to him. “Hey, Felix?” When he turned to face her, she continued. “I was having a really,” she looked down and exhaled. “Really s***ty week.” Then she looked up and smiled. “But tonight was perfect. Thank you.” She winked to him and walked out the door. 
He walked to the door to peer out and watch her leave. He wished he could follow her. Felix wished he could stop her from tomorrow. She shouldn’t have to die. Felix didn’t want to die either. He wished things were different.
But this was the last time this could happen. He began to concentrate really hard. Closing his eyes, he began to jump through time.
Felix opened his eyes. He was still facing the apartment door. He was still in his apartment.
Felix turned around to go to grab his watch in his bedroom and froze. The entire room was white space and black lines. And it was slowly disappearing. “No…” Felix gasped. “What have I done…” Felix opened the apartment door to a sea of white. The hallway was disappearing as well. Slowly, Felix was consumed into the white space.
………………
Felix opened his eyes. He was lying on his side, facing a white wall. His body felt like it was wrapped in warmth. Felix sat up. He was lying in a bed, wearing nothing but his boxers. He didn’t recognize the room. 
He got up and turned, looking about the room. He definitely did not recognize the room. He ran his hand through his hair, trying to stay calm, and think his way through this. Where am I? he thought. The last thing he remembered was his apartment evaporating. There was a door in the corner of the room. Curious, Felix opened the door and cautiously tip toed out.
“RAWR!”
Felix jumped a bit, startled. A boy in a dinosaur constume ran past him and into another room. Two dogs ran after the boy, chasing him into the room.
A woman appeared at the end of the hallway. She leaned up against the wall. She was wearing her pajamas and holding a white cup of coffee. Felix quickly recognized the woman. It was Lass. “Anthony, what did I tell you about scaring Daddy?”
……………………………………………………………………….
EXPLANATION: In the anime Steins Gate, timelines are explained as different pieces of rope. Those pieces of rope are made up of little strands or strings of rope. Felix going back in time and asking Lass slightly different questions did change the past, but not significantly. In other words, he was switching strands of rope (because he was slightly altering the past), but ultimately, he was still using the same piece of rope, and all the strands lead in the same direction. Lass’s death. Felix changing little things on their date would slightly change the date, but it wouldn’t change Lass’s future. It was inevitable on that timeline/rope that she dies. However, Felix kissing Lass and asking to see her again was not a slight change in their date. As she said, she was having a rough time, and Felix kissing her provided some bit of optimism, enough to prevent her from killing herself. This significantly altered the future. Lass now stays alive and as a result, Felix’s future changes as well. In other words, Felix’s decisions on their final date was enough to jump from one timeline to a completely new one (he changed the past enough to completely jump to a different piece of rope, which lead in another direction) causing Felix to wake up in another future entirely.



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