The memory of my death is fading away slowly, but surely. My human life ended with silent bubbles escaping my mouth and the ropes binding my legs too tight. My new one begins in the black abyss far from the surface, stronger and wiser than a mere pirate’s wench. I was nothing but bad luck back then, but now, now i’m strong. I am more than just the little girl those men blamed, I am more than human.

When you are given a second chance like my sisters and I, you use it. We are red with revenge, the sea does not know what to do with such beautiful color. I don’t remember my ship or how long ago I was on it, but I still swim up to the air and wait for it. They won’t come back for me, but they could still come back. Days go by and I spend my time taking care of other captains, there is much reward in little revenges.

My home is deep beneath the waters where man hasn’t even begun to tread and I feel safe. Safer than I ever was on land or on top of the sea with those wretched pirates. There is no warmth to be found here, but i’ve learned to live, if this counts as living, with the emptiness it brings.

The sailors come and I sing them a deadly song, feeding my hate with each kill. Every scream leaves me breathless and wanting more, but it all ends too soon when they sink to their graves. It was as close to perfect as I had ever come, I was as close to happy as the dead could be, but the waters changed the day I met her.

Some days the sun shines so bright and it lands in the perfect spot that you can see the shimmer and shine even at the darkest corner of the sea. Days like these are my favorite, there must be a reason that the sun touched me so gently the day I saw her.

Mother used to talk about love at first sight, that it was superficial and not of any true bearing. I believed her, I thought for so long that true love was when you knew a person inside and out, but seeing her tears roll down her face made me want to tell my mother she was wrong.

I did not fall for her looks, I fell in love with the way she sat on the sand, as if she was at home with the burning rocks surrounding her. I fell for her hair and just how I imagined it would feel between my fingers. Her hands, oh, they were small but strong and I could see them in mine so easily. Her beauty was overpowering, but it was not why I fell in love, I just did.

The voice of an angel, her song made me want to join, to make her smile or laugh or be happy. She is not the enemy, no, no way a person with such a sad yet beautiful song be malicious. I must have been obvious, there were few rocks to hide behind and my tail insisted on moving forward, getting just a little closer, to take whatever I could.

I was reckless, but it was worth it to see her surprised expression take the sadness and the tears from her face. I swam closer to her, curiosity did kill the mermaid. She is kind, with no evidence of the fear that usually comes when men see me. Relief washes over me and I bask in the feeling of feeling again.

It’s easy after that; to just swim over and say hello, to let her touch my tail, and to talk for the first time in forever. My voice is rough and words are fragmented, unlike her’s, which was as smooth as pearls. If this was only a dream I would be grateful to have just been able to remember it.

I visit her little island more than the water I was dropped to the sea on or the cave I call home. I’m finding my way to her almost everyday, bringing her trinkets and watching her dimpled smile widen whenever she sees me.

We become lovers, girlfriends, sweethearts, I don’t what this means but am happy to just lay beside her as she talks about her life before the sea. How something so full of light could have such a dark past makes me want to know more, know everything about her, but I don’t push. I don’t ask about her necklace that was clearly given to her by a different lover or why she’ll look away from something with a sad smile as if she was remembering someone. I just listen, because I am lucky enough to do just that.

My mission had always been to save women, to help them, but she shows me that what I was doing was wrong. I take away loved ones from the innocent and ruin their happiness, I believe her because how could such beauty lie. With a  smile so bright the sun is jealous of her light and eyes so green I feel as though I was on land again, her beauty astounds me every time I see her. My songs slowly begin to change, they’re no longer a call for the lonely, they were not for the men who had killed me, but for her.

Life moved fast and my body began to change, my tough skin began to soften just as my heart had. The teeth that I had once used to bite with were straighter, whiter, almost as pure as my lover’s heart. Once my dream was to end the life of all men, to rid the word of the trash that only pretended to love, those that would always disappoint. My love, she shows me that I should dream to change, not to end, and so I do.

Her voice follows me into the sea and stays with me late at night when I close my eyes. The whispers of love, of happiness, are making me better. I am more human than ever before.

That is when the storm hits and while the sea can take anything, I cannot. My body is a ship that my own kind has pillaged and sunk, there was nothing left to do but drown. She ties me up with rope, knowing how much it hurts me to remember the last time I had felt the burn and tug of them on my skin. Her eyes are no longer bright and loving, they look at me as I had once looked at men and I realize that my love was in vain.

If I were to regret one thing, it would not be to have loved her or to have never met her, I regret making her do this. I destroyed her happiness and, given the chance, I would have let her lover go so could be happy with him. The sea knows not of forgiveness as I had learned long ago, my hands still tied keep me anchored to the spot I lay.

My ship will never come, my sisters will never notice I am gone, but my lover feels a weight off her shoulders so I am free at last. Free from fear, from sin, from the hollowness that had followed me even in my past life, but, most importantly, I am free because of her.

With my last breath I say it, with as much feeling as I can “I love you.”