The beautiful white snow blanketed the rolling hills. The lush white ice capped every building and topped every car, and made the blue round post office boxes white. The snow absolutely filled the pretty grass. The snow topped all of the regular smart cars, and filled all of the convertible ones to the brim.

The children not in school for a few weeks are in their full solid color poofy jackets and matching wind pants making big huge snow men. Their loud joyous shouts can be heard from inside the house.

  John is getting ready for another super great day at his job. As he gets ready for work, he leaves his front door open so he can look at all the joyous children through his screen door. As he puts on his blue weave, he turns his blue IPhone 7 on.

He checks the time on his little bright screen, “oh flying fadoodles, I am late for work!” He instantaneously sprinted through his house and epic body smacked the screen door. He then proceeded to painfully open his screen door, lock it, and proceed to his snow covered car. He huffed and he puffed and he blew all of the snow off the car. He blew so hard that the snow flew all the way across the street and covered all the little children on the other side! With tire chains on, he quickly sped off to work, but still going the speed limit.
As he drove through the snow, he grew more and more nervous that he would be late to get to wally world and miss setting up the newest addition to the store, Christmas land!  He eventually grew so nervous that he missed his turn. By the time he realized it was too late to turn, things got worse. Not only was it too late to turn, but he was heading straight for a snow plough machine. John screamed as he spun the steering wheel with the ferocity of a dump truck driver.

As he was trying to avoid that rock, he failed to realize that he was about to hit a hard place, a huge pile of snow. John threw out his hands and screamed, “WOAH!” He then proceeded to jump the snow pile, fly 10 feet and hit the side of wally world! His car then got stuck in the wall mid-air. From there it fell backwards back out of the wall. He then jumped out of the car and screamed, “It wasn’t me.” Then to finish his ridiculous stunt he walks into the store from “De big hole.”

The next thing he does is call the only contractor in all of Bibalo Texas to come and fix his wall, and called a car person his car. Now for most people, this would bum them out, but not John, you see this is by far the very best day to be working at wally world. Why you may ask, because this is the day that all of the Christmas decorations are put up and the breathtaking Christmas section is set up. This made John Jacob Jakel absolutely ecstatic.

As he was running to the back section of the Christmas department, he accidentally slipped on a big puddle of eggnog. He sits up kind of confused, he gets up all like whatever and pushes the puddle under the isle columns using his foot. He then continues running to the back of the store.

Once he gets back there, he gets so excited that he nearly loses it. He just went to town on them boxes. Cutting boxes open, untangling lights as if they were a teenager’s earbuds, and putting decorations up. He spent his whole 9-5 shift laughing like a sea horse and making a whole quarter of the store look like a winter wonderland. He spent so much time and effort on the section of the store that by the time he was done, he was panting.

Finally, the moment came, all the lights up and everything set out. Right as he plugged them in, the entire stores power went out and all the lights shut off. Then one of the 2.2 million bulbs exploded in a flurry of light. When all of the stores lights came back on John was furious. Not only did the power go out, but one of his 2.2 million bulbs exploded. He was so sad that he clocked out and wen home.
As he was on his way home, he accidentally ran over some ones phone and the glass cracked, resulting in a blown tire. He went to grab his spare tire and, no spare. With his head slumped over he slowly and sadly walked to discount bibalo, the only tire store in Bibalo Texas. As he was walking down the dark, freezing cold road he saw a big fat green guy walking out a front door with some presents. He was all like, “Hey who are you.” The big fat green guy was all like, “Not you lol.” Now John knew he was the Grinch because he watched it last night. So he walked up and screamed, “My Christmas lights blew out,” and he epic backhanded the Grinch! Then the Grinch cried and ran away.

John continued on his way until he got to the tire store. Once he got there, the whole place was full of Christmas lights, Christmas lights everywhere. The pretty green and red garland hung all throughout the purple colored ceiling. He was ticked, their stuff was up and pretty but his wasn’t! He walked up to the desk and asked if he could get someone to come tow his car. Then the tow truck guy walked up to the front desk and was all like, “What’s up man, hey didn’t I just fix your car?” John sighed, let his head hang and replied, “Yea.” The tow truck guy asked where it was, and he responded with a sad, “Down the main road and on the left side.” John looked back over to the guy at the desk and he responded with, “Oh yea let me go get your rental vehicle.” The guy walked into the back and made a ringing sound, then came back up. John was all like, “Not the bicycle again.”

As he was on his way home he froze more and more. The ice sickles growing off his nose hairs were growing longer and longer. He was overwhelmingly cold. But he saw something out of the corner of his eye. It was his car, on fire! To his suprisement, John skidded to a stop on his bicycle to look at this huge bonfire. He thought to himself, how could his car be ablaze in this cold weather. He looked closer to find an ashy cigarette on the ground. Some person probably was speeding down the road in his huge lifted 4x4 and flicked it into his car. John had the absolute most depressed look on his face! He grudgingly left his little tiny smart car on the side of the road to burn in this frigid weather, and pedaled home.

Then right when he got back to his house, some little kids jumped him and threw like 50 snowballs at him! He ran inside and slammed the door shut. Then proceeded to grab a gallon of ice cream and watch Sponge Bob. However Sponge Bob was not on, once again. So he was forced to watch the Grinch, once again! So he just decided to go to bed and save his eyeballs the strain of watching that movie.

The next day he slept in a whole 2 more minutes, something he has never done before. He got up, got ready for work. He walked out his front door and realized, “Oh yea I don’t have my car.” Then went to go get his rental bicycle. He sadly rode the bike to work and was still sad when he got there. However when he walked through the doors, he was filled with hope that he could fix his lights.

So he strolled on over there and started jacking with them. He went through bulb after bulb for hours, he spent his whole 9-5 shift checking bulbs, until. One of the workers came over to the Christmas display and said, “Hey man you know you have a blown bulb over here right.” John ears perked up so high that they nearly hit the ceiling. He was as happy as a college graduate! He ran over there and thanked the worker until the cows came home. Then John ran over to the wall outlet, plugged them in and. Christmas lights everywhere, there were so many blinding Christmas lights that the eyeglass store had a sale! he was absolutely delighted.

Then he looked behind him, and there stood a cow, with the Grinch riding it. John almost lost it! He ran over there and epic round house kicked that cow, and down it went, with the Grinch trapped underneath it. The weight of the cow was so much that it broke the Grinch’s leg. He looked straight at John and asked, “Who are you?” With the straightest face John walked right up to him, got right in his face, and screamed. “NOT YOU, LOL!” It made his day. Then he called the cops and had the Grinch sent to jail.

After his shift was over, he rode his rental bicycle back to the tire store, and to his delight, his car was fixed. It was even polished and stuff. He excitedly ran into the store and asked how much he needed to pay. The guy at the front desk replied, “Merry Christmas, it’s on us!” This was the best Christmas John Jacob Jakel has ever had!