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Shine Your Light MAG
Life is not easy for anyone. People struggle, trying to get from day to day without too much heartache. What makes me different from others? I am overweight. I am the biggest person in my high school class of sixty kids. I have struggled my whole life to fit in and be accepted by my peers.
Ever since I can remember I have been conscious of my weight. The first time I was ridiculed was the first day of kindergarten since I was already overweight. My feelings were spared by no one. To all of my classmates, I was a freak. I was so young that I’m not sure I knew what was happening. Looking back now on how I was treated, I am filled with sadness at the thought that little children can be so cruel.
I remember having crushes on boys in elementary school and when they found out, they would be embarrassed. No one wanted the “fat girl” to like them. I was excluded even by those I called my friends. I was never considered “cool” or invited to my friends’ parties because they were embarrassed to have me around their other friends. People still thought I needed to be reminded daily that I was different, that I was fat.
As the years progressed, my classmates matured and learned what is socially correct. Some have stopped openly making fun of me, but I am still treated differently by many. Some friends still exclude me when they are around boys. I have never had a boyfriend, even though I have been told I have a great personality and a pretty face. I receive little attention from male classmates, most will not even treat me as a friend.
I can never understand why people are so put off by me. I am not ugly. I have exceptional hygiene. I wear makeup and have a good sense of fashion. I’ve tried a hundred times as hard as the next girl to be accepted.
Recently I have stopped caring whether I am liked by the “in crowd.” Who are those people anyway? They are the ones who go out every weekend drinking and making bad decisions. I want to be better. I am better. I don’t need others to tell me who I am.
I want to be liked and loved for who I am and who I am inside. I have so much to give, and I am tired of trying to give it away for free to people who don’t want it. I know now that I deserve something in return. Why should I humble myself to those who don’t deserve me on my worst days? I shouldn’t, and I won’t. Not anymore and never again.
Differences should be celebrated, not opposed. Why do we want everyone to be the same? How boring and dull the world would be! We should never let others bring us down. Our light is placed on this earth to shine, and I am ready to shine. I can only hope everyone else is ready too.
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