Middle School Relationships | Teen Ink

Middle School Relationships

May 19, 2009
By lexie alford BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
lexie alford BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
2 articles 0 photos 0 comments

In middle school, there are many relationships “the boyfriend/girlfriend thing”. I have been in a couple of relationships and looking back I think I was just too young for them. Then I thought - what is the point? Therefore, a first question for this passage is….
1.
Why have relationships in middle school?
Most people feel pressured to have one, especially pre-teenage/teenage boys. They do not want to be made fun of by their peers, so it is another form of peer pressure. They feel they need to “score” so they can be cool. Statists show that 89% of teenagers have been in a dating relationship and they feel that they have to be a part of that. On the other hand, teenage girls feel loved when boys start “sweet talking” to them; Many girls then think they are all special and what not and go for it. Some teenage girls have relationships just because of the simple fact they feel like it.

Parents and teachers will mostly agree that in middle school you are too young to date or be in a romantic relationship. Many young adults however think they are ready once they hit the teenage stage. That brings up question #2….
2.
Is middle school too young to have a relationship?
Technically, if it is legal you can do it, so you are not too young to date; however, many middle school students are too immature or not ready emotionally to date. If you think you “have to” have a boy friend/girlfriend then you are definitely not ready. Depending on a boyfriend/ girlfriend is a horrible thing to do because people are not the most reliable, which leads to a situation called being “Heart Broken”. Another reason you should not date is because between the development ages of 12-16 hormones start raging and of course you’re going to be attracted to the opposite sex, but that doesn’t mean you have to date them. In addition, many teens are too immature to date. If you’re in a relationship just for the “score” that’s very immature. A relationship should consist of you actually liking the person - because what if they actually like you? If you do them wrong, because of your immaturity, they are going to be hurt, maybe even devastated. Another point is- if you don’t have self-control to do the same thing with your romance partner that you would do around your parents – then you definitely don’t need one. If you cant control yourself, then who can?


Now once you think you are ready for a relationship there are many common questions about starting a relationship, conducting the relationships, keeping them, then the breaking up. So the next questions will evolve around those subjects. First up is the hooking up part. This will form the next question….
3.
How do you start a relationship?
Before you rush into a relationship you have to first see if you are compatible if you don’t even get along with the person then how are you going to maintain a relationship with that person. At first, you are usually going to be physically attracted to the person before you get to know him/her. The best thing to do then is hang out with them and get to see their personality. If you are compatible with that special someone and you both like each other than go for it.

Next after starting the relationship is maintain it. This immediately brings me to my next question….
4.
How do you keep a romantic relationship?
Maintain a relationship takes work from both mates. First, the relationship needs to have honestly. If you are not honest in your relationship then your romance will end quicker. The first couple of lies you may get away with, but what happens when you get caught in a lie? Second, you have to have trust. If there are trust issues then you and your boyfriend/girlfriend will be very insecure about what happens when you are not around. The relationship will fail if there is no trust. Trust me on this one from experience. I have had this happen to me and seen it happen many times. If they don’t stay true then they aren’t good to be with anyway. Well my last and probably most important tip on staying in a relationship to get along with the person you are dating. If you only argue with your mate then you are soon going to not want to be bothered with the person. I have seen many people call the person they are dating annoying and have broken up soon after so try to be friends first with your boyfriend/girlfriend.

Middle school relationships are complicated and there is so much more to cover on them; however, if you want to read more by Indolysia Alford then you are going to have to check out next month’s issue for Middle School Relationships Part 2



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