For most of my life, it’s been just me and my mom. My father was 18 when I was born and really didn’t want a baby. That and the stupid decisions that sent him to jail kept him away from us.

My mom gave birth to me at the age of 17, forcing her to grow up quickly and even drop out of school her junior year. This was really hard for her, but she fulfilled her parental responsibilities.

I suffered growing up without a dad. I could not understand why he wasn’t around and I remember writing him about anything and everything going on in my life. I also remember crying myself to sleep. I was never mad at him because I never understood why he wasn’t there, I just wanted him home.

As time passed, it got to the point where my mom would make me write to him. As I grew further from him, I got closer to my mom. Not having a father left a void in my childhood that my mom filled.

Over the years my mom and I have gone through a lot, not only my feelings of being a fatherless son, but with each other. We both get under each other’s skin and I can get out of control, maybe partly because of what I heard and saw when I was younger. My mom and dad would argue and I heard things I should not have. I thought it was okay to do as I had observed. My mom struggled to deal with me and felt guilty for her mistakes.

Now that I’m 15, I find myself thinking about everything I’ve endured. Sometimes, I wonder what it would have been like to have had a father who was there for me from day one. I also try to flip the situation around and imagine being a single parent. I’ve come to the conclusion that I probably could not have done what my mom did. I can’t even remember to take out the trash, let alone care for a baby. My mom put her life on hold for me. She just received her GED and on average works 10-hour days before going to college.

My mom has had to deal with more than most and I don’t know how she does it. I really appreciate her. She is the most important person to me. Many people have come in and out of my life, but she has always been there for me. I don’t know if there is a greater mom than mine. I am truly blessed. Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.